Why do you have to watch your back at NASA? They want to probe Uranus.
Why don't oysters share their pearls?
Because they're shellfish!
Why doesn't Mexico have a Olympic team? Because everybody that can run, jump, and swim are already in the U.S
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
(I want to apologize in advance. These are very dark jokes) 1. What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick
2. I was going to tell a dead baby joke. But I decided to abort.
3. Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? His wife is dead.
4.Why does Helen Keller hate porcupines? They're painful to look at.
5. Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.
6. Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
7. I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes. The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.
8. My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
Why do dwarfs laugh when they run a race because the grass tickles there balls
Why did the legless kid think he won a race?
Because everybody already left.
Why did Billy not like the soccer ball he got for Christmas?..
He has no legs...
Why did Paul Walker cross the road?
He wasn't wearing a seatbelt
Why did Steven hawking die,he ran out of data
Why was 10 afraid? Because he was in the middle of 9/11
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Why did potassium draw a tear that would consult in him crying?
Because all of his friends argon
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Why did Johnny not like the audiobook he got for his birthday?
Johnny was deaf.
Why won't Trump be subject to impeachment? Answer: Because Republicans in Congress insist that every baby be brought to full term!
Why is Steven Hawkins good at skate boarding ? Cos he's always on the ramps
Kid sees their grandma taking pills and asks... "Grandma, why do you need to take all those pills?"
"Well, Grandma needs to take the green medicine for her headaches, but the green pills give her diarrhea. So grandma needs to take the yellow pills for diarrhea but those pills always make grandma very depressed. Because of her depression, grandma needs to take the black pills, but those always give her high blood pressure. To cure the high blood pressure, grandma has to take the red pills, but those make her always very horny. That's why grandpa has to take the blue pills."
why cant orphans play baseball they don't know where home is
