Why are chickens so awesome? Because... Chicken noise.
Why Jokes
Why can orphans not go on field trips? They need a parent signature.
Why does Mario eat mushrooms?
Because he's a very fungi!
Why did the Russian cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Here is a dark joke for you guys... "Why do pornstars scream, "DADDY!" in their videos? Because they were child molested by their father!"
Q: Why did the boy not eat the banana?
A: He was scared the juice might come out.
Me: I'ma sign up to be a clown.
My friend: Why?
Me: Because my life is a joke. 😂
Why did the orphan call Mr. Smith "daddy"? Because he put her in the vices and taught her a lesson about virginity.
Why did the orphan call her boyfriend "daddy"?
Because she wanted that D.
Why do any orphans have sex?
Because they can't call anyone "daddy."
Why did Billy kill himself with a TV remote?
He wasn't even REMOTELY close to being happy.
One man was very depressed because he lost everything. He lost his job. He lost his home, and he lost his wife. So he went lonely into the forest to grieve.
Suddenly, with his head raised up, he sees Santa Claus walking by. "Santa?" he asks. "Why are you early? It is not even Christmas?"
"Ho, ho. Don't worry about me. Let's worry about you instead," says Santa. "What is the problem, my friend?"
"I lost everything good in my life. I got fired from my job. My wife divorced me. I lost my house."
Santa: "I can help you. You can wish three things you want in life, and I'll give it to you."
Man: "My first wish is I want my house back."
Santa: "Done!"
Man: "My second wish is I want 1 million in cash in my bank account."
Santa: "Done!"
Man: "My third wish is I also want my job back!"
Santa: "Done, but before I actually give you those wishes, I have to hump you."
Man: "Okay. Let's do it."
So Santa Claus takes off his pants to hump the man.
After they are done humping, Santa asks the man: "How old are you?"
Man: "I am 35 years old."
Santa: "And still believe in Santa Claus??!! HOHOHOHO!!!"
Why was 911 annoyed at the pizza guy?
Because they ordered meat lovers, but they got plane.
I've never been to Bradford before until today. While driving through the city center with my dad I asked, "Would you set up a business here?", to which he responded "No".
So I asked "Why not, you'd make us rich!", He gave me a confused face and asked, "How so?".
So I said, "Because sales would be fucking booming!"
I know, it's an awful joke.
There were two snakes slithering along when one snake said to the other snake, "Are we poisonous?" "Idk why?" The other snake responded, "'Cause I just bit my tongue!"
Why did Rolf Harris meet underage kids?
To tie his kangaroo down, sport!
Why didn’t the toilet cross the road?
Because it got stuck in a crack!
Why would a man spend his whole career at a barn?
Because it's stable.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
It doesn't know where home is.
Joke: "7 8 9" (seven eight nine), why is 8 (eight) scared of 7 (seven)?
Answer: This is because; in "7 8 9", 8 is pronounced as (ate). So because seven ate nine, eight is scared that seven would eat eight also.
