Why jokes

Why do orphans always get an iPhone X?

Because it doesn’t have a home button.

Why do orphans eat cereal with water?

Because dad never came back with the milk.

Why are Michael Jackson and caviar so much in common?

They both come on little white crackers.

Why can't you hear the pterodactyl go to the bathroom?

Because the "p" is silent.

Why did the little girl cry twice?

Because you wiped your shitty bloody duck on her favorite teddy bear.

Why did the little girl cry twice?

Because you wiped your bloody shitty cock on her favorite teddy bear.

I was digging in our garden and found a chest full of gold coins. I wanted to run straight home to tell my wife about it.

Then I remembered why I’m digging in our garden.

A man walks up to Lil Johnny one day and asks, "If you had one wish, but that wish will be granted to everyone on Earth... what would it be?"

So Lil Johnny thinks real hard and long, then said, "Well, I would wish for me to shit myself."

The man is shocked and asks why, and Lil Johnny replies, "Well, I would be on the toilet. I think everyone else would just be confused!"