A man walks up to Lil Johnny one day and asks, "If you had one wish, but that wish will be granted to everyone on Earth... what would it be?"
So Lil Johnny thinks real hard and long, then said, "Well, I would wish for me to shit myself."
The man is shocked and asks why, and Lil Johnny replies, "Well, I would be on the toilet. I think everyone else would just be confused!"
Why did a girl like bananas?
Because one day she might need to be ready.
There was an Indian riding in the desert when he saw a little blond-haired white girl up ahead. He heard her crying. So he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her, "Hey, what’s going on? Why are you crying? Where are your parents? What happened?"
The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The bandidos came, killed my father, my brothers, then my mother, and raped my sister."
The Indian just laughed, untied and dropped his breechcloth, then said, “Guess this isn’t your day, is it?”
Why do you only see girls in groups of 3, 5, 7, and 9?
Because they can’t even.
The emo kid ran away after his parents asked why they took the barcode sticker off the Oreos.
Why is he sooo dam fineee?
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call daddy.
Why do orphans only have Samsung's? Because they don't have a home button.
Why did the orphan wait in line?
To see their parents next.
Why did the orphan have to eat his cereal with water?
Because his dad never came back with the milk.
Me: (Jaiden) Why are you crying? Do you know where your parents are?
Orphan: *Sobs* "No."
God, I love working at an orphanage!
Why did the orphan cry when the teacher yelled at him?
Because the teacher said, "Don't make me call your parents!"
Why do orphans like boomerangs?
Because they come back, unlike their dad.
I was walking down Main Street when I saw a child.
I told him, "I will give you 20$ if you get my balls back from the vet."
He replied, "Why did they take your balls sir?"
"Beer plus going to the vet does not work well for everybody, especially when you're a furry."
Man: Stop with these orphan jokes!
Me: Why? Are they going to tell their parents on me?
Why don't cows make good policemen?
Because they refuse to go on steak-outs!
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have nobody to call "daddy."
Kobe: Stop doing dark humor!
Me: Why? They don't land well together?
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he had no balls to do it.
Why do orphans make terrible baseball players?
They don't know where home plate is.
