Why did the hooker fall in love? Stockholm syndrome.
Why Jokes
Why did my dad cross the road?
To get to the nearest building so he wouldn't die in the crippling smoke of the most terrifying and only terrorist attack on American soil.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Why do orphans look so ugly?
Because they have a face not even a mother could love.
Why can't dwarfs go to space? Because NASA is not sending monkeys into space anymore.
Why did the depressed person rob a bank? Because you're not killing yourself if a cop does it for you!
Q: Why is America bad at chess?
A: Because they already lost two towers.
Why did the bike fall over?
Because it was two tired.
Why are Putin and Zelensky neighbors?
Apparently, a big dick needs a great set of balls next to it.
A woman was sitting alone at a bar, and a man approached her. He asked her why she looked so sad. She responded that her boyfriend had just broken up with her because she was too kinky.
The man expressed his amazement when he admitted that his girlfriend had dumped him because of his fetishes. After a few drinks, they decided to go back to her place.
When they arrived, she told him to make himself comfortable while she freshened up. The man complied. After a long time, she burst open her bedroom door and said, "I hope you're ready!"
She stood in the doorway wearing a latex body suit and a gas mask. She had a whip in one hand, a flogger in the other hand, and a 12-inch strap-on dangling between her thighs.
The dude looked at her and said, "Thanks, but I'm good for the night!"
She said, "I thought you said that you were kinky."
The dude replied, "While you were in there, I f-cked your cat, pissed in your plants, and came on your curtains. It's been fun!"
Why did the math book look so sad?
Because it has many problems.
Three men met on a nude beach. Two of the three men were happy, but the third was sad.
The three men broke into a conversation. The topic eventually reached the men's jobs, and why they were at the beach.
"I'm a construction worker," said the first man. "All year long I toil in the sun in very heavy clothes, so this seemed like the perfect vacation for me. If I can relax and do it naked, that's a win-win."
"I'm an accountant," said the second man. "I just like how everyone here is dressed exactly the same."
The first two men turned to the third, sad man. "What do you do?" they asked.
"I'm a pickpocket," said the third man. "My doctor sent me here."
So a lady was walking down the street with two bags, and one of the bags was leaking $100 bills. A cop pulls up and he says, “Ma’am, ma’am, your bag is leaking hundred dollar bills.” Then she says, “Oh, thank you. I wonder how long that’s been going on.” And the cop says, “Before I help you, may I ask why your bag is leaking $100 bills?” And the lady says, “OK, I’ll tell you. So I live next to a stadium, and I have this beautiful rose garden, but these dumb teenagers always try and pee on the rosebushes. So they stick their junk through the fence, and I grab their junk. I said, ‘$100 dollars or it’s coming off.’” The cop says, “Oh, OK, well what’s the other bag for?” And she says, “Well, not all of them want to give me $100.”
Why did the North Tower want chocolate ice cream?
Because he didn't want plane.
Why are 9/11 victims so good at reading?
Because they can go through 100 stories in 5 minutes.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they have no home to run to.
Why was the Pakistani bomber angry? Since he got a pepperoni instead of a plain [pizza].
Why was the PUBG player sad?
Since all his friends went to school while he went to Pochinki.
Chef: “How did you enjoy your steak, sir?”
Customer: “I asked for it medium rare, but it’s well done!”
Chef: “Why thank you.”
Customer: “You don’t understand, the steak is well done!”
Chef: “Of course it is, I made it.”
Why can’t the orphan get any of the new iPhones?
'Cause none of them have a home button.
