Whats jokes
What did the big tree say to the little one? Grow a pear!
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.
Man to woman: "Would you sleep with me for one million dollars?"
Woman: "Sure."
Man: "How about for ten dollars?"
Woman: "What do you think I am?"
Man: "We’ve already established what you are. All we’re doing is negotiating price."
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef! Hahahahahaha!
What is the difference between your girlfriend and your sister?
They're both "sweet home Alabama."
What do you call a flying pig?
Fiction.
What do you call a Russian pharmacist?
"Ivan Astichestykov."
What do you call a Russian man with three balls?
'Whodya nikabollokov'
What's the definition of a bastard?
Answer: A man with a 1 inch dick and a 10 inch tongue and all he wants to do is fuck!
Your classmate: You're so ugly.
Me: That's what your mom said when she had you and called you a mistake.
Little Johnny was playing with dick when his teacher walked in the room. She asked him what he was doing, he said Im doing my homework. The teacher saw how big his cock was and asked him to have sex with her. He willingly did so. Little johnny was already 25 so it didn't matter. The only thing was that he was homeschooled.
What do you call an Indian man stuck in a tree?
A leaf.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Head 'n Shoulders.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo?
Head and Shoulders.
What happens when animals do a squat?
It doesn't become pretty...
What's the difference between the Barracuda car and a fish?
The fish can't go fast.
What's the difference between crazy people and regular people?
We don't live in their heads.
What's a crazy man's favorite phrase when he has a knife?
"Freak out!"
What's a bison's favorite gun?
A PP Bizon.
What's a knife's favorite person?
The victim.