Whats jokes
what do you call a white person having a seizure?
a vanilla shake.
What do turtles and lesbians have in common?
They both choke on plastic.
What is worse than a baby getting hanged in a tree?
That same baby getting hanged in multiple trees.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples are actually picked.
What do you call Juice WRLD in a coffin?
A juice box...
What do bees like with sushi?
Wasabee.
What's white and black and red all over? A nun that fell down stairs.
What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.
What's the difference between a baby and a bowling ball?
You can't use a pitchfork to get the bowling ball out of the truck.
Girls: OMG what color should I use, baby blue, light blue, or navy blue?
Boys: blue is blue.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Q: An apple gets picked.
What is the difference between Harry Houdini and everyone else in my life? Harry was the only person not to disappear.
What do you call a bunny jumping backwards?
A receding hairline.
What's the cruelest joke?
Life.
What is the difference between a white octopus and a white squid?
A white octopus isn't in the KKK!
What's the difference between oxygen and children? I don't have oxygen in my basement.
So, a blind guy is sitting on a park bench with his seeing eye dog right beside him. Suddenly, his seeing eye dog cocks his leg and pisses all over the blind guy's leg. So the blind guy gives the dog a treat.
A man taking a walk saw the entire thing and said to the blind man, "That is the most charitable thing I’ve ever seen, your dog deliberately pissed on you and here you are giving him a dog biscuit." The blind man says, "Oh it’s not what you think, I’m just trying to find his head so I can kick him in the ass."
What's an orphan's family photo?
A selfie.
What does a terrorist get for Christmas?
A C4.
What is the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnant woman?
You can unscrew a lightbulb.