Whats jokes
What’s the difference between an emo and grass? The grass doesn’t cut itself :D
A young 38 year old happy Muslim migrant living in Sydney wants to wed a beautiful young bride. He asks the local Aussie the minimum age to wed his yet unchosen bride. "Eighteen," the Aussie says, sipping a beer. "She has to be Eighteen."
Okay, the Muslim man sighed, with disappointment and walks off. Next day he arrives with a 13 year old girl.
"Wtf are you doing?" Aussie says?
"You say this is okay," Muslim replied. "Fuck no, she must be at least Eighteen you sick bastard," says Aussie, flicking away his Winnie Blue cigarette. Muslim man leaves angrily.
Next day Happy Muslim settles on a 14 year old girl from Punchbowl to be his bride. Aussies jaw drops, "What is wrong with you mate?" asks Aussie.
Muslim man replies "You tell me to choose 'a teen', 'a teen', I chose a teen and now you come for my third and now fourth choice. Fuck you!"
Aussie: "Eighteen not 'a teen' you sick mongrel."
Me: Yo wanna play 9/11?
My Friend: What’s that?
Me: It’s a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter, he's not coming.
What do you call a plate that lies? Dish-onest!
What do gay men like cocks?
🍦🍦🍦 they like the cream filling 😋
What's a psych ward worker's favorite incense?
Insurance fraud.
What do Polish people in Poland use chop sticks for?
tweezers.
What do you do when you finish a magazine in school?
Answer: You shoot it!
What is the definition of polish sausage?
🐴🍖 Horse meat.
🤔 What do Polish people 🇵🇱 🇵🇱 🇵🇱 in Poland do with 📰 📰 📰 📰 newspapers 📰 📰 📰 📰 after they are done reading them?
Use them for toilet paper. 🧻 🧻 🧻 🧻 😆 😄
Teacher: What’s the closest planet?
Kids yell: Sun.
Except for one.
Other kid: Uranus.
Teacher: Uranus?
Other kid: Yeah, it’s right there.
What do you call a prostitute with a major in math?
The thot that counts.
What do you call an orphan when there 18?
Homeless.
What do the initials ACLU stand for?
🤔
American Communist Lawyers Union.
What's the difference between a cat and a human? About 500 bullets.
What do leaves and suicidal people have in common? Nothing, one falls from the tree and one doesn't.
What games would deaf people not be good at?
Simon says and Musical chairs.
What do you call an orphan when he's taking a photo?
Family photo.
I'm really bored and I don't know what's up with Prince. He isn't talking to me.
And Freshfry, why are you so mean now?