Whats jokes
What do the Titanic and the Montréal Canadiens have in common? They both sank to the bottom of the Atlantic.
Q. What's a bulimic's favorite movie?
A. The Purge.
What did the floor say to the ceiling?
"I look up to you."
What are the similarities between orphans and unripe strawberries?
None of them get picked.
What does the 'w' in Africa stand for? Water.
What's the most played game in Africa? Hunger Games.
What’s one thing orphans don’t have on their computer? A home page.
What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?
Nothing. You can't cross a vector and a scalar.
What do you call a body without a nose?
Nobody knows.
If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What type of bee can't fly...
Answer: Kobeee!
My cousin: Brother, I lost in a game of Call of Duty: Moe Bill [he was supposed to pronounce it as mobile; however, I left it as it is].
Me: So tell me about it then.
My cousin: I lost to Sum_Baldi.
Me: Somebody? Don’t they have, like, the name of you opponents?
My cousin: No, no, no, the name was Sum_Baldi. S.U.M_B.A.L.D.I.
Me: Ok, my bad. Continue.
My cousin: I got Sum_Baldi, and 5 seconds later, I got kill[ed] by Sum_Fing_Wong.
Me: It’s not wrong! In Call of Duty, you are suppose to kill or be killed.
My cousin: No, no, no, the name was Sum_Fing_Wong. S.U.M_F.I.N.G_W.O.N.G.
Me: My bad again. Do continue.
My cousin: I got so angry I blow[ed] up.
Me: So you got blowed up, by what weapon?
My cousin: By the game.
Me: [was not expecting that for an answer]
What do you name a family reunion of an orphan?
"Me time."
You know what's the most awkward situation in the world? A rapper with erectile dysfunction.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
"Boiled ham" is what you call a dead Russian.
What’s long and black?
The line at the unemployment office.
What happened when the emo went through the self-checkout?
Two beeps went off.
Kid. What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher. What?
Kid. Fruity pebbles with water.
Teacher. Why water?
Kid. Cause his dad never came back with the milk.
Q: What's black, white and red all over?
A: A blushing zebra? No, Michael Jackson after a Pepsi advert.