What's an orphan's least favorite movie?
Home.
Whats Jokes
Once there was this kid that wanted to shower with his dad, so his dad said yes. Then he asked, "What is that?" and his dad said it's a chow chow train.
The next day, he wanted to shower with his mom, so she said yes. He asked again, "What is that?" and she said it was a tunnel with light.
The same day, he wanted to sleep with them, and they said yes.
In the middle of the night, he woke up and told his mom to turn on the light because the chow chow train is going in.
What do you call a white bucket?
A pail.
Me: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Me: Your parents.
What do you call a lamp that molests young boys? A Jacko Lantern!
What did the people in 9/11 say when they got the wrong pizza? Man, they got it wrong, I wanted this shitty plane!
I asked my orphan friend what his movie is, he said "Spiderman: No Way Home." I said, "Probably because it's so relatable, right?" He started crying. I don't know why.
What do priests and McDonald's have in common? They both like putting their meat in between 5-year-old buns.
What does McDonald's and priests have in common?
They put their meat inside 10 year olds.
What goes cackle, cackle, *bonk*?
A witch laughing its head off.
I specialize in jokes about orphans. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What is the difference between a feminist and a gorilla?
At least gorillas don't abort their own.
What do you call a guy at your doorstep with no arms or legs? Matt.
Halloween joke:
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a teacher?
A blood test.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag?
One is made of plastic and bad for kids; the other one holds shopping.
What's the similarities between dark humor and cancer?
It's funnier when kids get it.
There's a lot of talk about starting families, but no one ever talks about finishing what they started.
What is the difference between an emo kid and a cutting board?
What do you call an emo with curly hair?
Sam Reid.
What's the difference between an orphan and a bowl of apples?
The apples got picked!
