Weight jokes

- Got myself a bathroom scale so now I know exactly how much I poop.

- Right. So you weigh yourself before and after you poop and calculate the difference? That’s cool.

- Oh...that might actually be even easier.

Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a scale and it said: "To be continued."

Yo mama so fat, she is 4 feet tall laying down.

You're so fat that you only know 3 letters: KFC.

Your mama so fat, when Santa saw her he said, "Ho, ho, holy s***!"

What do you call an obese man with bipolar? Twins.

Yo mama's so skinny that when she walks outside, she floats to Heaven.

When fat people sit down at a restaurant, and you listen closely, you can hear the chair screaming.

If your daily is a Chevy, then your mom is super heavy.

You're so fat, when you went on the scale it said "to be continued."

All normal-sized babies are delivered by stork.

Heavier babies are delivered by crane.

How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?

You pay the ice cream man to keep on driving. IDK.

Your mama is so fat that she took a picture at Christmas, and it's still downloading.

Joe mama so fat, she could not walk the stairs of heaven.

Credits: to my friend.

Yo mama so fat, she needed cheat codes for Wii Fit!

I'm so skinny, I could use floss as a noose.

Your mum sat on a phone, and she turned it into a pancake.

My friend was told by her doctor that she was morbidly obese.

As if she doesn't have enough on her plate.

Don't make fun of fat people. They already have a lot on their plate.

Yo momma is so fat, when she tried to hang herself, the noose broke.