Want jokes
My mom wanted me to brush my hair.
And I just told her that even pet animals don't like their hair brushed...
By the way, this isn't a joke or a poem. I just want to say, please check out Gwen's puns. They're good!
3 men walk up to Indians, one American, one Muslim, and one African American. The Indians say, "We're all gonna kill you." One of the men asks why. The Indian says, "So we can use your skin to make kyanks." He also says, "Y'all decide how you die." The Muslim says, "I want to drown," so they drown him. The African American says, "Shoot me." And the American grabs a fork and starts poking himself everywhere, I mean everywhere. The Indian said, "What's the point of this?" and the American says, "F**k your kyanks."
Yo mama so fat that when the cashier at KFC asked her what size bucket she wants, she said "the one on the roof."
Why did the school go remote?
Because the teachers wanted to play with remotes!
So, I text my girlfriend and told her I wanted to get inside her. Can you believe she replied: "Not again brother, I'm only 8."
Q: Why did the cow touch an electric fence?
A: Because it wanted to get electrocowted! 🐄
Why do depressed people want to kill themselves?
To be loved on the news show for 10 minutes.
A blonde walks in and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde comes back the next day with brown hair and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde comes back the next day with brown hair and says, "I want to buy that TV."
The seller says, "I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde asks, "That's it, how'd you know I was a blonde?"
The seller replies, "Because that's a microwave."
Why did the dog go into the fire?
Because it wanted to be a hot dog!
This is a classic.
Why did the Dog go into the fire?
Because it wanted to be a hot Dog!
RICK: GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT OH GUESS WHAT MOTHERFUCKER OR IMMA SAY IT!!!!!!
Richard: What????
Rick: So before Donald Trump's impeachment, he said, "The Coronavirus will end on March 32nd 2021."
Richard: Your from planet Earth where there's a March 32nd. Enjoy it, *stupid dumb fuck brother*.
Rick: Oh I will.
*It was the day March 21st*
*9 Days later*
*March 31st*
Rick: oh I cant wait until tomorrow!!!!!!!!!! Ooh im so excited im gonna give my friends a big ole bro hug and hand shake i miss the muhfuckin dudes man
*one day later*
*He got his school uniform waiting for the bus not seeing it*
Rick:....... wai......Huh!?!?...... hol....up
BITCH IM AND IDIOT THERE IS NO MOTHERFUCKING MARCH 32ND THIS IS THE MOTHERFUCKING 1ST OF APRIL TRUMP DUMBASS
*Richard*
*oh he's the dumbass*
I will give you all the fine chicks you want. Just dial this number: 313-974- tap that ass from Hooters strip club.
What do you call an injured person who doesn't want to play a game with you? A sore loser.
Why did the boy study for his math test in a tree?
'Cause he wanted higher grades.
Your mom wants to tell you that you're adopted, but you were an orphan.
I wanted to play as Kobe in my console, but the game crashed.
Why does an orphan play GTA to be wanted? 😂😭
Kid: I want to be like Batman.
Genie: I can make arrangements. The kid comes home, both of his parents are dead.
Genie: I told you.
Kid: .............................................
Why did the astronaut bring the seeds to space?
Because he wants to planet the seed! 🤣🤣🤣