Worst Jokes Ever

Yo mama so short, she wakes up every day in a brick house singing “Everything is Awesome”.

Where does Stephen Hawking get his computer fixed?

At PC World.

Why did you scream? Oh... Helen Keller tried to cook... 😨

Goats are so lazy these days. Computers have more RAM.

There are 4 people in a line. Three stand up and say "We are standing up for cancer," and then there's the one in the wheelchair.

How do you make a baby float?

You take your foot off its head.

A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "What, no soap?" Then he dies and she marries the barber.

Any girls on here?

Anal, haha.

What is the difference between lettuce and a hamburger?

When the lettuce runs, the hamburger cries.

My pee pee fell off.

You never told me you were part orangutan. Have you considered taking a vacation to Planet of the Apes?

"Herro, I cannot see my eyes."

You know bins????

They're trash!

What's the good thing about fucking 21 year olds?

There's twenty of them!

So I was on Google, and on my computer it had Windows. When Stephen Hawking died, it shut down, the shutdown sound played, and wouldn't turn on again.

A girl comes up to her dad and says, "Can I borrow the car tonight? I want to go to this party." Dad says, "If you give a head job..." The girl says, "You're my dad! How can you say that?" Dad says, "If you want the car..." The girl thinks, "Okay." She starts. Dad says, "That tastes like sh*t." Dad: "Yeah, your brother wanted the car this morning."

101 pedo jokes.

Why's everything x2, need to get this shit dick off before the coppers come, it's called women taking advantage, you'll shit the bitcoin, 90% percent of pedo's who don't admit they're like kids blame the police, shit your kappas, you only want my veins why don't you inject me with smack, run in with ya black armbands, I've been sized for a million pound, stop giving me strain asking questions, I know what's going to happen next, bet the judge is a women, jealous coz your drink tastes like shit?

Is it coz your shit though? How many bids have you done? Shit 1 million views, don't try bribe me, did the police give me snip? How's my barbie doll or shall I say my little pony? The police beat fuck outta me, what's all these needle marks on my arm, I can tell you want something, why's everything like one big cycle, police own the dark web.

Keep it going on lol.

I don't think anyone even checks these jokes.

Little Johnny asks a fireman, "Do you want to see my fire truck?"

So the fireman goes to look at it. Little Johnny tested it. "I got my hat in my fire truck."

So the fireman says, "Last night's alright, but why is it tied up to you wagging?" And he looks closer and sees the string is tied up in knots. He said, "That's nice all right, but why is it tied up to his nuts?"

The little Johnny said, "Well that's my son," and so he yanks on it.