Worst Jokes Ever
What kind of flower do orphans use to bake bread?
Self-raising...
My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tried to fight me, so I said: "If you wanna fight me, I'll run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs, I'll already be down the stairs waiting," and he started crying.
"Hey Kels, what's on your arm?"
"Oh, that was the cat."
"We don't have a cat..."
"Oh..."
I asked a European what do you call Karens in your country? He said, "American women."
You're so fat you need butter to get in the car.
Why does Adolf hate golf?
He ended up in the bunker.
What’s Hitler’s favorite letter?
Not Z.
Your hair line is curved like a moving train.
What do you call a nut that screws and then bolts?
An escapee from a mental hospital.
My gf/bf said: "I'm dating your uncle!" You cry and you look under your bed and your uncle says: "Damn."
One night a guy asked his wife where she wanted to eat. She said, "Chinese food," so he flew her to China. The next night, he asked her what she wanted to eat. She said, "Indian food," so he flew her to India. The last night, he said, "What do you want to eat?" and she said she wanted nothing, so he flew her to Africa.
My husband and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
Kid: Which were me, are your parents?
Orphan: What are parents?
It’s amazing just how paranoid Hitler was.
In Hitler’s Germany, it was illegal to make jokes about him or his regime.
Come on! Forbidding Germans from making jokes? Isn’t that a bit like forbidding Americans from eating salad?
When you're working in the Twin Towers, but you have to turn your computer to airplane mode.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
What's the difference between Vin Diesel and an orphan?
Vin Diesel has family.
Your forehead and your hairline must be friends, because they go way back!
I thought a waitress said to me, "You're good looking." In fact, she was asking if I'd like some pudding.
How do cats masturbate? They lick they pussy.