Yo mama was so fat, the Earth was flat before they put your mama in a grave.
Your hairline and forehead must be friends, because they go way back further than the universe.
I recently learned that churches won’t let trans men become priests because they don’t consider trans men as men, which is rather confusing to me.
As a Jew, I don’t know very much about Christianity, but from what I’ve heard, don’t priests love little boys?
True story: In 1986, in the midst of the HIV epidemic, they made condoms available to the public. At that time, me and my boyfriend were 13 years old. My boyfriend was so happy: "These will make great water balloons!" And I was even happier. I did not have to pack a lunch for school tomorrow, lol.
Your forehead and hairline are like friends; they go way back.
If an orphan wins the lottery, what do they have to use all of it on?
Years of child support!
What is the difference between the Titanic and the Twin Towers?
They both went down.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They can go 1, 2, 3 but they can’t go home. 🤣
Me: why are Americans so good at rubix cubing? Friend: why? Me: they have a history of separating colors.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can never get a home run.
Why is Afghanistan good at chess? They take the rooks out fast.
What is the biggest fear of an American soldier taking a piss in a bush during the Vietnam war? His manhood will be chopped off.
Your forehead and your hairline must be old friends, because they go way back.
Yo mama's so fat that the earth used to be flat before they buried her.
What does the Bartles and Jaymes wine cooler television ad have in common with ministers who are white Christian nationalists?
They both thank you for your financial support.
Why can't poor people write jokes?
Because they make no cents.
Why can't Asian people use a telephone?
Because they might wing the wrong number.
A: What do you call a sophisticated American? B: Canadian.
A: Why aren't there any Mexicans in Canada? B: They can't run that far.
«A: Что вы называете искушенным американцем? Б: Канадец.
A: Почему в Канаде нет ни одного мексиканца? Б: Они не могут убежать так далеко».
Why do orphans get confused about ancient Egypt? Because they wouldn’t know what a mummy is.
Why do orphans rob banks?
Because they wanna feel wanted.
Why couldn't Jesus have been born in Florida?
Answer: They wouldn't be able to find "Three Wise Men" or a virgin!
