Thereness jokes
Why can't orphans eat chips?
'Cause they're family sized!
What is an orphan’s least favorite movie?
"Spider-Man," because it told them there was no way home.
In a game, there are crew members that have to keep the ship running. But little did they know, there was an imposter among them.
Sound familiar? 🤔
Well, in September 11th...
Why do orphans dip their Oreos in water?
Because dad never came back with the milk.
BF: Babe, I have two questions.
GF: Ok, ask!
BF: Where have you been all my life?
GF: Aww, that's so sweet. And the second question?
BF: Can you please go back there?
Why can't you play memory snap in the jungle?
Because there are too many cheetahs.
Coworker: Knock knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Coworker: Not your parents.
What do Mexicans cut their pizza with? A Little Caesars.
Boy: Will you remember me in a minute?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Will you remember me in a day?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Will you remember me in a year?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Knock knock.
Mom: Who's there?
Boy: Bitch, you forgot me.
I would like to complain about the new sushi restaurant at Gatwick Airport. Although there were large portions going round on the conveyor, they did taste a bit like luggage.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Tornado." "Tornado who?" "Tornado going to suck yo house up."
Why are there 25 letters in the alphabet? Because the D is in U.
Knock knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Not your parents.
Bf: Hey, what ya doing?
Gf: Just lying in bed.
Bf: Just lying in bed?
Gf: And eating cereal.
Bf: Ha, nice, what would you do if I was in bed next to you...?
Gf: Eat my cereal.
Bf: I mean if the cereal wasn't there.
Gf: I'd get out of bed and get more cereal.
How are the Twin Towers and genders similar? There used to be two, but now it's a sensitive subject.
What do a school shooter and a person with gum have in common?
One's the pull it out everyone wants to be their friend.
In case there's a school shooting, the teachers can help out and shoot the kids.
There are some questionable candies out there, such as:
"All I want is a good Blow Pop."
"I don’t even want to know where that Butterfinger has been."
"If you do, you’ll probably end up with tasting the rainbow."
"Nobody wants to bite into an O’Henry."
"Or adopt Three Musketeers."
"Or even end up with a Sour Patch."
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: “What the hell was that all about?”