Them jokes
Why do orphans hate the color black? Because it reminds them of their dark history.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Tell them to clap until their parents come home.
Hey girl, are your pants a mirror? 'Cause I can see myself in them.
How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? All of them if you keep reloading.
Why does an orphanage stay overnight at a school? Cause their parents won't pick them up.
Memes
My friends were really annoying me at my birthday party, so I decided to pop a balloon to spook them.
Maybe going on a hot air balloon ride wasn't the best idea.
I don’t see why emo kids don’t like to hang around.
I see them hang all day.
Just hire some people to be fake parents and print off an adoption paper. On April Fools', just leave them there at the orphanage! APRIL FOOLS!
How do you blindfold a woman?
Put a windshield in front of them.
What is the difference between a Mexican maid and a Jewish maid?
One of them won’t clean the oven.
What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in a bathtub?
Throw them some laundry.
What’s the best part about sex with twenty eight year olds?
There are twenty of them.
What's the same with shoes and slaves?
When they get loose, you tie them up.
What was Michael Jackson's answer to the parents of the little boys who were left with him when asked why does he do it that way? Tell them that it's human nature.
If an Indian kid is conceived in incest, would that make them OMbred?
What do parents tell little boys to make them behave?
"Be good, or when you're asleep, Michael Jackson will get you!"
What's the difference between a sheet and a baby?
One of them is really loud when you iron it.
What's the difference between a feminist and a pencil?
One of them has a POINT:)
Jeff, did you hear they're making a film about Jimmy Savile? It’s a very touchy subject.
Yeah, I did, Gary, but did you hear the reviews on the Bill Cosby film? People said it was so boring it put them to sleep.
What do cigarettes and hamsters have in common?
They can both be dangerous when you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.