Them jokes
I like Christmas.
It’s the holiday where an old man breaks into people’s homes so he can give them toys! :) yaaaaay 😁
I got banana nut bread for you.
Oh no, the nuts are missing!
Oh, I found them!
You know where they are?
UP YOUR BUTTHOLE!
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
Depends how hard you can throw them.
Why do orphans love violent video games like GTA?
They never had parents to protect them from it.
Yesterday, there was a blackout on my street.
So I sold them.
What's the difference between an orphan and a corpse?
One of them has someone to mourn them.
Why should you wrap your hamsters in duct tape?
So they don't explode when you f*** them.
What part of "Another One Bites the Dust" do you sing to a disabled person to make fun of them? "I'm standing on my own two feet."
If someone is mean to an orphan just say, "I will call your mum," and make them cry even more.
Two hunters are in the woods when one of them collapses. He's not breathing and his gaze is blank. The other hunter grabs his phone and calls emergency services: "My friend is dead! What do I do?"
The emergency dispatcher replies: "Calm down. I can help you. First, make sure he's really dead."
Silence on the other end, then a gunshot. Back on the phone, the hunter asks: "Okay, now what?"
What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?
Little boys turn them on.
What happens when a depressed kid try’s to high-five a tree?
The tree leaves them hanging.
What’s the best thing about sex with 119 year olds? There are 100 of them.
Stephen Hawking tried joining some music bands, but all of them rejected him... except Daft Punk.
What's the difference between yo mama and German men?
The balls... German men don't have them.
Q. Why do orphans love elevators?
A. Because they're the only things to raise them.
Who can jump the highest?
Emos, some of them are still falling.
I can't decide if I like rocking chairs or not.
I keep going back and forth on them.
Tell someone that you're gonna say “I 1 poopoo” and it will go in order of numbers, so they say, “I 2 poopoo” & so on:
You) I 1 poopoo
(Them) I 2 poopoo
(You) I 3 poopoo
(Them) I 4 poopoo
(You) I 5 poopoo
(Them) I 6 poopoo
(You) I 7 poopoo
(Them) I 8 poopoo
And be like, “You ate poopoo??! EWW!!”
Trump's cabinet are like panties. Some crawl up your butt, some snap under pressure, and some actually cover your butt when you need them.