The jokes
What is the best thing about being back?
Free bullets.
Yo momma's teeth so yellow, when she smiled at traffic, all the cars slowed down.
Just saw the news that Kobe passed. I guess there's a first for everything.
Throw a few paper airplanes at the twins in your class, see if they fall.
1, 2 buckle my shoe.
3, 4 buckle some more.
5, 6 Nike kicks.
1, 2 buckle my shoe.
3, 4 open the door.
5, 6 Nike kicks.
Memes
Hello! Why did the duck cross the road? To prove he wasn't chicken!
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
Because they ordered pepperoni and got plane. (Yes, it's "plain," shut.)
What did the Twin Towers order for dinner?
Two large planes.
A: What did the lawyer say to the amputee?
Q: You haven't got a leg to stand on.
My wife said she wanted steamed vegetables with her steak, so I put her father in the hot tub.
I'm not saying you're stupid.
But you're the reason plastic bags come with the warning, "Do not place over head!"
What do you call a black man in the army in camo? Incogneggo.
Two guys in a car get pulled over by a cop. The cop taps the window, and the window rolls down. "Good evening, gentlemen, we're looking for two pedophiles."
The guy quickly closes the window. Ten seconds later, he lowers it again and says, "Ok, we'll do it."
¡Hola, soy Dora!
Can you help me find the two fucks I'm supposed to give?!
Why did the cellphone get glasses? Because it lost its contacts!
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a good body these days?
I think Jeffrey Dahmer had the right idea, just put it in the freezer.
What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to the men he took home that said they were hungry? "I've got Ben and Jerry's in the freezer."
Hit 'em with the 1, 2, Jeffery Dahmer!
Michael Jackson was the King of Pop until he got burned by Pepsi. Now, Pepsi is the hero, and now, we know the rest of the story.
I found Jeffrey Epstein’s diary the other day.
The last entry was about 12 years old.