The jokes
How did the retard win the break dancing competition?
He saw flashing lights.
Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl go to the bathroom?
Because it's extinct.
A pun enters the room and kills ten people.
Pun in, ten dead.
What did the dalmatian dog say after he finished his meal?
"That hit the spot?"
What did the plate say to the other plate? Lunch is on me! 😂
Memes
New horror movie idea.
The main character loves anime. The killer yells "Omae wa mou shindeiru." The main character instinctively yells back "NANI???" and is killed.
Yo mama is so ugly, when there was a tornado, the tornado refused to suck her up.
Have you heard about the pedophile who was guilty of robbery?
He took a girl's innocence.
I had to write an essay about Africa, and I failed because I plagiarized the Hunger Games script.
What did the blonde say when I told a rape joke?
"Can you show me what rape is?"
So Americans strongly worship Donald Trump, eh? Well, let's put that claim to the test by throwing him into the general population of Rikers Island.
What can an elevator do that an orphan’s parents can’t?
The elevator can raise a family.
Why did the tomato cross the road?
To ketchup with his friends on the other side.
Ice cream truck drivers are the most sus people on earth. They’re adults who play children’s music and give ice cream to kids who approach their van.
Why are Captain from SpongeBob and Michael Jackson so similar?
They both say, "Are you ready, kids?"
I was crying at school and telling my friends that my grandpa died. Then I told them I still remember his last words. They wanted to hear them. They are: "you still holding the ladder?"
What's the difference between orphans and apples?
Apples get picked.
The worst thing about an owl is how they can maintain eye contact when you put them in a microwave.
There’s going to be a wild party at the orphanage tonight...
The parents aren’t home.
Where does the Batman go to pee?
The Batroom.