The jokes
A gingerbread man walks into the doctor’s office with a broken arm. He asks the doctor, “Doc, what should I do? My arm is broken!”
The doctor then looks at him and says, “Have you tried icing?”
Why should you fear white people in prison instead of the blacks?
Because you know that whites are in for actually committing something.
Did you hear about the fire at the shoe factory?
Unfortunately, many soles were lost.
What did the boy say to his fingers? I'm counting on you.
What do you give the dentist of the year? A little plaque.
Memes
What's a pirate's favorite letter? You'd think it's the "R," but it's really the "C."
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?"
What was going through the heads of the 9/11 victims on the 42nd floor?
The 43rd floor.
What’s worse than getting a job at McDonald’s?
Not getting the job at McDonald’s.
A man went into a library and asked for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian said:
"F*ck off! You won’t bring it back."
What’s better than winning the Paralympics wheelchair race?
Walking.
What’s the difference between a baby and a baked potato?
About 140 calories.
"What did the zero say to the eight?"
"That belt looks good on you!"
The Flanders Song
God said to Noah, "There’s gonna be a floody-floody."
Rain came down, it started to get muddy-muddy.
Get these animals👏out of the arky-arky."
"Leave me alone!"
Yo momma is so ugly even the trash man wouldn't pick her up.
I wish the grass in my yard was emo. It could just cut itself.
What did one volcano say to the other? I lava you.
Why did the computer catch cold?
It left a window open.
What did the earthquake say when it was done? Sorry, my fault!
Why did the computer go to bed?
It needed to crash.