The jokes
"Yo mama's so fat that when she farts, Al Gore accuses her of global warming."
9/11 wasn’t the date, it was the score.
Inflation is so bad, McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
Don't challenge Death to a pillow fight.
Unless you’re prepared for the reaper cushion.
What’s the first thing you should do if an epileptic is having a seizure in the bathtub?
Throw in your dirty laundry!
Memes
What’s the difference between a fetus and a jar of pickles?
The pickles aren’t as tasty in a jar.
My father always used to say:
"What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger."
Until the accident.
Don’t you hate it when you are driving in a school zone and the speed bump starts screaming?
We say “Father, I have sinned,” because it would be weird if we said, “Daddy, I have sinned,” right?
“Forgive me, Daddy, for my transgressions!” We say the “Our Father,” not the “Our Daddy.”
Why was the math book sad at the rapper?
Because it knew it couldn't count on his bars.
Why did the rapper become a chef?
Because he wanted to drop some HOT PLATES.
Why was the rapper always the first one at the party?
Because he never missed a beat!
Why did the rapper become a pilot?
Because he wanted to take his flow to new heights!
What did the rapper say to his BLENDER?
"Mix it up, yo!"
Why was the rapper always in good shape?
Because he dropped the mic and picked up weights!
What did the rapper say at the bakery?
"I need ALL the dough you got!"
Why did the rapper climb a ladder during his performance?
He wanted to take his career to the NEXT LEVEL!
Why couldn’t the booty be on social media?
It had too many FOLLOWERS behind it.
What does a crooked lawyer who is not on the ACLU payroll have in common with a crooked politician who has an office in Washington, DC?
They both sign their names using a blue pen 🖊 🖊.
Why did the guy bring a rope to the party?
Because he wanted to hang out... permanently. 💀😈