The jokes
If I died and went to heaven, do you think I’d be friends with Prince?
The only thing that makes me want to stay alive more is the thought that Prince would hate me.
Your hairline is so nonexistent, even the universe couldn't find it.
Why was the cookie angry? Because someone ate the chips!
What did the dog say to the cat? Ruff!
Fat bully. That was just the starter, now do you want the main course?
Me: I don't think I want that because you already ate it.
What did one ass cheek say to the other?
"Blimey, what's that smell coming from the corridor?"
I found two of the same Lego Duplo sets, so I called ‘em “Duplocates.”
What's the worst time to fly a plane?
I got in an argument with the 90-degree angle. And guess what? It was right!
What did the neutron say to the atom?
"Sandwiches, dude!"
Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because they can't.
Why did the Scarecrow get a promotion?
Because it was OUTSTANDING in the field! 💀💀😂😂😂😂😂
Yo mama so ugly, when she was cutting onions, the onions cried instead of her.
Two antennas got married. The ceremony dragged on, but the reception was excellent.
I don’t know why I’m in jail. So, basically, I was at a gun range, and we were supposed to hit the targets, even though I hit it.
Why do orphans rob the bank?
Because they want to be wanted.
Why did your mom cross the road?
You were on the same side as her, and she wanted to get as far away from you as possible.
What's Osama Bin Laden's favorite song currently?
"Under the Sea" by The Little Mermaid!
Why is Texas the worst state ever?
They only have one star.
What did the drum name its children? Anna 1, Anna 2.