The jokes

You must have been born on the highway because that's where accidents happen.

You are so fat, you are fatter than the fattest.

A girl is meeting this Muslim for a date, and she asks him, "So are you Indian?"

And the Muslim goes, "No, bitch, I ain't 7-Eleven, I'm 9/11!"

I saw a kid in the yard and I asked where are your parents.

Then I got fired from the orphanage.

Why did the NBA remove the glory hole from the men's locker room?

Too many black basketball players sucking too many white cocks before the game.

A man saw a kid on the road, and the man asked: "Where are your parents?" The boy: "..." The man left the adoption center.

L bozos fell like my grandma on the stairs.

Me running from the principal because I put ten woman's rights books in the fictional section!

Why do emo kids not jump?

They're still in the sky.

LMAO, what is the difference between an orphan and a watermelon?

One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other's just a watermelon.

I was lip to lip yesterday, and now I can't get the cum out of my mouth.

My BALLS itched when I crashed the plane.

Your mom is so fat that she made the earth flat.

A book went to the doctor’s office and said: “Doctor, doctor, I’ve got thesaurus throat ever.”

I took the trash to the recycling bin, and two days later, my mom asked me, "Where's your sister?" I said, "In the recycling line to be turned into a bottle."

How do you find out the price of an emo? You scan his barcode.

Why do cat orphans watch sci-fi movies?

Because they won't understand what the mother ship is.

What did the constipated bum say to the other bum?

Piss don't s**t on me!

Why don’t Chinese kids get to celebrate Christmas?

'Cause they're the ones making the toys.

What is the difference between the subway guy and a priest?

The subway guy didn’t get away with it...