The jokes

America get pranked lol.

Biden's penis is probably as big as the Twin Towers right now.

Oh wait...

Why did the orphan stop playing baseball?

He could never get a home run.

Your momma is so stupid, she farted and turned the radio on to cover up the smell.

Why did the orphan turn gay?

A: Because he wanted someone to call him "daddy."

Your hairline goes as far back as the cavemen. Your forehead is also as deep as the cave.

I asked to switch seats on a plane because I was next to a crying baby.

Evidently that doesn't work if the baby is yours.

"I told my mom I thought parenting got easier as the kids get older, and she laughed so hard she cried a little."

If a blind person can’t see, then do they sleep?

They’re the night watchers while people who see sleep.

Why did the man miss the funeral?

He wasn’t a mourning person.

You know you’re not liked when you get handed the camera every time they take a group photo.

A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, “Have you heard about the mad cow disease that’s going around?”

“Yeah,” the other cow says. “Makes me glad I’m a penguin.”

I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me.

In middle school, we had to create words with magnet letters. Some kid laid the word "Animal Therapist". I changed one space and got sent home :/

Yo mama so fat that she walked in front of the TV, and I missed a whole episode of iCarly.

What is the difference between E.T. and an orphan?

E.T. can actually call home.

What’s the difference between a mountain and your girl?

At least the mountain has two hills.

The man fired from the World Trade Center on September 10.

That is just plain wrong.

Why was the cheese always so confident? Because it had such a "gouda" self-image.

Arab rizz. Are you a tower? Because I wanna blow you up and don't let your friend know about this. Rashid, I told you not to blow it up, I had it.

The greatest Arab pilot, my grandfather.

Why is it okay for a woman to use me when she feels like it, but when I use her body when I feel like it, I am the bad guy?