The jokes
"Karma is the guy on the Chiefs, Coming straight home to me."
What's the similarity between Christmas stuffing and my penis?
I like them both inside dead animals, because alive animals feel too much like men, and then I'd cum too quick.
What is the difference between a hipster and a hockey player?
A hockey player showers.
Do you know what the F in orphan is for...
Family.
The show COPS has been dropped from broadcast,
honoring the longstanding tradition of police turning off their cameras.
Memes
How did the Emo ask the other Emo out?
"Wanna hang together?"
A doctor walks into the room and tells his patient, "I have some bad news for you. You really have to stop masturbating."
The man looks aghast and says, "Oh my God, doc, why?!"
The doctor replies, "I'm trying to examine you."
What is a terrorist's DJ name?
Osama Spin Laden Dropping beats like the Twin Towers!
How do you break up two blind guys fighting?
Yell, "My money's on the guy with the knife!"
What's the easiest way to make a glow worm happy? Cut off its tailβit'll be delighted!
Why doesn't Mexico win any medals in the summer Olympics anymore?
Because all the Mexicans that can run, swim, or jump are already here.
The north and south towers got into an argument.
The south tower said, "We will talk about this when we are on the ground."
What's the similarities between anonymous and a cow? I think you know...
How do you get a monkey off the wall?
You jerk him off!
What was the weather forecast when the planes hit the World Trade Center? Partly cloudy with scattered passengers!
If you hit an Indian person on the forehead with a dart, is it considered a bullseye?
What's the natural cure to an old man's inability to forgive people?
Alzheimer's.
What war did the black community win?
The Obama era. Only to lose to a smarter white person.
Why can't you be gay and in a wheelchair?
Because you can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.
I think Kobe misunderstood the 6-ft rule.