Farmer walks into his bedroom with his wife in bed with a sheep under his arm says this is the pig I'm fucking she say u idiot that's a sheep he says shut up I wasn't talking to you
Me in the middle of the night boiling water.
Me talking to my brother: How do you make holy water. My brother: How Me: You boil the hell out of it.
Leave a like if your like sex and porn.and talk to me if any question
i always say no to drugs but considering that im talking to them rn i probably already said yes
A bird was on a branch at school today. I turn away to talk to my friends and another bird was there when I turned around. I turn around again and the birds are having fucking sex!!!
What the fuck.
Now I've seen everything
A kindergarten teacher was telling a story...
A kindergarten teacher was telling a story about a farmer walking around the farm talking to the animals. She was trying to get the kids to interact, speak up, and to use their imaginations.
"Mister Farmer stopped at the cow, and the cow said 'Morning, Mister Farmer!'. Susie, what do you thing the farmer said next?"
Susie says "He said 'Good morning Mrs. Cow!'"
"Mister Farmer stopped at the pig next, and the pig said 'Good morning, Mister Farmer!'. Johnny, what do you thing the farmer said next?" Johnny says "He said 'Good morning Mr. Pig!'"
"Mister Farmer stopped at the chicken, and the Chicken said 'Morning, Mister Farmer!'. Billy, what do you thing the farmer said next?" Billy says "The farmer said 'Holy shit, that chicken is fucking talking!'"
why should you never talk to pie at a party? bc it goes on forever
Guys talk to me is what the emo loner said but seriously talk to me.
Me talks to an orphan: hey I have a joke Orphan: go on then Me: your family tree
What do orphans have in common with mute children
They can't talk to there parents
My wife told me pass her lip stck but i gave her a glue stick now she is not talking to me
what did stephen hawking say when trying to talk to a reporter, beep boop beep beep boop.
Here's what to do if an annoying person keeps talking to you. First ignore them until they ask you if your going to respond. Then ask them: if they were walking down the street and a rabid dog suddenly started barking at them would they get on all fours and bark back? After that continue to ignore them.
Why are orphans lonely Because they don't have parents to talk to
Hey talk to me here
A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend." The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better." "Thanks Dad," the son says. The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."
one day i caught my sister talking to my girlfriend and she said "you never told me your Lesbian" and i said "no,not at all" my girlfriend ask "why did you not tell her" and i said " because every time i bring a girl home i hear to much noise in her room and i never get the chance to kiss them because she's cleaning the trash" and she said "yeah,the trash is her junk"
1. Are you talking to me becasue i think you talked to my back side. 2. Your mom must taste good because it is always in your mouth. 3. My foot last longer than your life.
Kid: Imagine being an orphan!
Parents: Look who's talking, not you cause you ain't got no one to talk to! *vanishes*
Kid: WAIT WHAT!
A wife and husband go to a barn, the husband picks up a goat and says “Look at this pig I have to sleep with every night.” The wife says “Honey that’s a goat.” The husband replies with “I was talking to the goat.”
