Two atoms were walking on a street. One atom said to the other: "I'm feeling really positive today" and the other replied: "I know. I stole your electron". Then the first atom said "How Ionic"
To whomever stole my anti-depression pills, I hope your happy now
in the new grinch the whos would say he stole christmest get him then the grinch said im a orphan that changes everything the whos said what would they do if max was a orphan
Things said by racist aliens:
"Some of my best friends are Green." "I just know that Orange guy stole my spaceship." "You're very pretty for a Purple girl." "We know you Tentacletians like to rape everyone with your tentacles!" "Adax Hitao should have finished off you Bluish people." "You 2-headed people are so stupid!" "No Slimatians are allowed in this restaurant because of health codes." "Get out of my store you grigger!" "The Plu Plux Plum meeting is tonight! Let's burn some spaceships on the Greenies' lawns!"
To whoever stole my antidepressants I hope you are happy now
A bully walks up to a kid named Billy to insult him and steal his lunch money. Later that night when he is at home, the bully’s father comes into his room to insult him and take the lunch money he stole. The father walks down stair to check on his father in the living room. When he walks in, his father insults him and takes the lunch money. The grandfather of the bully walks into the back yard and in the dark is Billy. The grandfather walks up to him and says “Where’s my money you worthless old fart.”
Man: whats up? Me: im annoyed Man: Why? Me: I stole my gf's heart Man: So why are you annoyed? Me: Everyone else in the surgery room gave me weird looks
The other day someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.
I would create an orphan website..... But you need a home page to do that. (since somebody stole this joke before)🤷♀️
Why did the vegetable go to jail? He kaled a man and stole a 9 carrot gold bar.
Why did the baseball player go to jail? Because he stole first base
Did you hear about the man who stole a calendar? He got 12 months.
Worst joke ever.
A man walks into his house, only to find out somebody stole all of his lamps. He was absolutely delighted.
whats the difference between cancer and me
my dad didn't beat cancer.....whelp i guess i stole that one
To the man in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket: you can hide, but you can’t run
Did you hear about the two burglars that stole a calendar? I hear they got six months each.
Yo mamma so stupid when a robber stole her TV, she ran after him saying, "you forgot the remote"
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were out on a hike. They had been going all day, so they decided to make camp and stay for the night. They both woke up at 3 A: M
Holmes said, look up Watson what can you see?
Judging from the position of the stars, it looks like it's about 3 A:M
What else Watson
It looks like it will be a beautiful day tomorrow
What Else Watson
What am I supposed to see Holmes?
Elementary my dear Watson, someone stole our tent
why does sally hate herself, cause Sophie stole her boy
Someone stole my toilet and the police have nothing to go on.
