Stephen Hawking

Stephen Hawking jokes

Cloud

At least he got D.L.A. (Disability Living Allowance), so it's not all bad. Every cloud has a silver lining...even a mushroom cloud.

Road

Why didn't Stephen Hawking cross the road?

Because he rolled over to the other side!

Wheelchair

Stephen Hawking got an engine swap with a Nissan 350Z, and they said his wheelchair wasn't street legal :/

People

Could never understand why people would say Stephen Hawking is a dead man walking.

Detector

Do you know Stephen is dead? He doesn't have a stone. Do you know how to find him? A metal detector.

Heaven

I'm not sure how I'm going to get to Heaven.

God had not built a ramp yet... or an escalator.

Man

Stephen Hawking was an unfaithful man. He had an affair with Alexa.

Step

Why can't Stephen Hawking go to heaven?

'Cause he'd walk up the stairs!

Phone

My phone was at 10%, and my friend said it better not shut down like Stephen Hawking.

Song

What's Stephen Hawking's other favorite song?

Steve Winwood's "Just Roll with It Baby."

Date

Stephen Hawking went on a date last night.

She left after 15 minutes, complaining she didn't like his tone.

Microsoft

What did Siri say when Stephen Hawking spoke to him... Sorry, I don't like Microsoft.