Why do so many people get charged with rape? Because they are too stupid to finish her off and bury the body.
SOS Jokes
Two cannibals have just captured a man and are about to eat him, so they cook him and lay him on a table. The first cannibal says, "You start at the bottom, I start at the top," so they both chow down.
About half an hour later, the second cannibal says, "I'm having a ball!" Then the first cannibal says, "Then you're eating too fast!"
The cemetery is so crowded, people are just dying to get in.
So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.
When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"
He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."
Why do orphans kill people so they can finally be wanted?
Your mama is so ugly, she tried summoning Candyman, but he refused to come!
Your hair is so far back, you left it at your last address.
Your mom is so fat when you printed the picture, it would not stop printing! 😂🤣
Your teeth are so yellow they slow down traffic.
Your hairline is so far gone that it looks like someone dropped a nuclear bomb on it.
John and Chloe are in school arguing about who has the more heroic grandfather.
Chloe says, "My grandfather killed 50 Nazis, he's so heroic!"
John says, "So what? My grandfather KILLED Hitler!"
"Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella.
Yo mama is so ugly that your dad has to be drunk to bring her home.
Yo mama is so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
Alabama gene pools are so shallow, when they freeze over, it's just snow.
Joe mama so fat, hello kitty said goodbye.
Yo mama is so fat that I could write 3 paragraphs, and she still wouldn’t fit.
Yo mama so ugly, when she went to unlock her phone with her face, it said, "disconnected."
Your forehead is so big, a whole jungle grew on it.
I know the voices in my head aren't real, but man, do they have some good ideas.
