SOS jokes

Yo mama so fat, she called Dr. Seuss and he couldn’t even rhyme back.

Your mom is so ugly her face would split in half when she sees you.

My dad tells me and my sister to stop arguing, so she elbowed me in my damn nose.

Don't y'all just hate when something funny to you happens and then you just have to be quiet so you don't look like a villain?

Roses are red, violets are blue, give me free OnlyFans so I don't touch the youth.

My mom ate my food, so I ate her pet hamster.

Every time my grandmother and I were at a wedding, she’d say: “you’re next.” So I started saying the same thing to her at funerals.

Your mom is so fat Santa Claus came down and said, "Ho ho holy shit!"

Here's a tip for cow tipping from TheRussianBadger.

"So if you see Otis from Barnyard, make sure you blast his ass from a distance!"

I slit my wrist and said, "THAT'S A LOT OF DAMAGE!" So I did it again, but with a knife and said, "NOW *THAT'S* A LOT OF DAMAGE!" I then put watertight Flex Seal on the wound, and it didn't seal.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

So it could get to the other side!

Bo: Hey kids, I am so sad that you won’t exercise and give me Bo power, so I am just going to be an orphan.

Kids changing the channel to Annie.

Annie: Tomorrow, tomorrow, only a day away.

TV changing the channel back to Bo On The Go.

Dezzy: WAAAAAAAAAA, I can’t find Bo!

Your forehead is so big it drips pickle juice!

My friend is so ugly, she got surgery twice, but not even that could fix her.

My life is so meaningless that I committed a crime just to get shot. 0-0

This is not a joke; this is just about death...

Yo mama's so fat, she thinks the buffet is the starter plate.

So I went to a church the other day and I asked my friend, "Is that painting of Jesus and is it through the wall with one with three nails?" Oh wait, I wasn’t even Jesus, he’s not doing the T post that he invented.

My sister is so dumb, she genuinely spent lockdown studying for a COVID test.

Your momma's so fat, when I went to suck her tit, I got a mouthful of knee.

Your momma's so fat, she farted in bed and blew the covers off.