SOS jokes

I was struggling on a math test when a girl in a wheelchair leaned over and said, "Hey, this is the easiest thing I've done all day."

I was triggered, so the next day when we were doing the pledge, I leaned over and said, "This is the easiest thing I've done all day!"

TJ's hairline is so far back, if you travel back in time, you still won't find it.

When you find out the stripper you're banging is a hooker, but you're saving money, so it's okay.

Why did my dad cross the road?

To get to the nearest building so he wouldn't die in the crippling smoke of the most terrifying and only terrorist attack on American soil.

Friend: Hi, orphan.

Orphan: Tell me a yo momma joke.

Friend: ummm

Orphan: Exactly, U can't.

Friend: Yo momma so disappointed she left!

Why are orphans so bad at baseball?

Because they don't know what a home base is.

Why are short people so angry?? Cause they're closer to hell.

Yo mama so stupid, she raised you.

Why am I so fat? When I was younger my mother said I should be the bigger person.

Yo mama so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas, and it's still printing to this day!

One of my friends named Jill had a drug overdose.

She didn’t have any of that drug after that. For the rest of her life, she acted very high. When she died, it was because of natural causes, not the drug. So this proves that a lethal dose is also a life time supply.

Yo mama is so fat, when she sat on Walmart, she lowered the prices.

Why are orphans so famous for their jokes?

Because everyone says go big or go home!

A woman is in the hospital giving birth. The doctor comes up to her afterwards.

Dr: "I'm sorry, I have good news and bad news."

Woman: "What's the bad news?"

Dr: "Your baby is Ginger!"

Woman: "Ok, so what's the good news?"

Dr: "It's dead!"

Your momma is so stupid, when someone said it’s chilly outside, she brought a spoon and bowl.

I saw a black man riding a brand new bike, so I went home to check my garage. It’s all good because I still saw mine still chained to the floor begging for food.

Why are gay guys so rude?

Because they’re fucking assholes.

My son told me he has to bring an object for show and tell at school.

So I had him bring my wife.

Why are women’s feet so small?

So they can stand closer to the sink.

Yo mama so fat, when God said, "Let there be light," He was just asking her to move.