SOS jokes
Why is a bee's hair so smooth and sticky?
Because they use honeycombs.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they don't know what a home base is.
Friend: Hi, orphan.
Orphan: Tell me a yo momma joke.
Friend: ummm
Orphan: Exactly, U can't.
Friend: Yo momma so disappointed she left!
I was struggling on a math test when a girl in a wheelchair leaned over and said, "Hey, this is the easiest thing I've done all day."
I was triggered, so the next day when we were doing the pledge, I leaned over and said, "This is the easiest thing I've done all day!"
TJ's hairline is so far back, if you travel back in time, you still won't find it.
Memes
"In chess, a queen can move in more directions than the king."
I mean, yeah, the chessboard looks like a kitchen floor, so-
Suicidal thoughts aren’t nice, but nor is life. So why not get them both done and over with?
So the man asks me, "Jesus, how do you want your steak?"
So I said, "Well done, my good faithful servant, well done."
You are so fat that the waiter said to you every time: "Sorry for your weight" instead of "Sorry for the wait."
why was the bad baseball player so good at bowling?
He kept making strikes.
You're so skinny, you use chapstick as deodorant.
One of my friends named Jill had a drug overdose.
She didn’t have any of that drug after that. For the rest of her life, she acted very high. When she died, it was because of natural causes, not the drug. So this proves that a lethal dose is also a life time supply.
Why are orphans so famous for their jokes?
Because everyone says go big or go home!
Why am I so fat? When I was younger my mother said I should be the bigger person.
Yo mama is so fat, when she sat on Walmart, she lowered the prices.
Bubba couldn't make rent, so he offered to sleep with the landlady instead.
I think he forgot he lived in his mom's basement.
Some kids at school made fun of me for playing Halo, so I gave them a halo.
Your momma is so stupid, when someone said it’s chilly outside, she brought a spoon and bowl.
A woman is in the hospital giving birth. The doctor comes up to her afterwards.
Dr: "I'm sorry, I have good news and bad news."
Woman: "What's the bad news?"
Dr: "Your baby is Ginger!"
Woman: "Ok, so what's the good news?"
Dr: "It's dead!"
Why do women like Pac-Man so much?
How else can you get eaten three times for a quarter?