Someone jokes

Someone ordered pizza on a tower... A plane came.

I photo bombed someone's selfie, and then they yelled, "Why would you do that? I was trying to take a family photo!"

Why are Nepalese bad at chess?

Because someone already killed their king!

How does a non-binary ninja kill someone?

They slash them.

What did the blonde say when someone says, "Your baby is so cute?"

"For the last time, I don't want to sign up my child for Tindergarten just yet!"

I made an advent calendar for a Jehovah’s Witness.

Behind every door someone tells you to fuck off.

Why are Nepalese 🇳🇵 bad at chess?

Because someone already killed their 👑.

Sometimes I look at someone I hate and think, "I hope you get laid tonight."

By a tweaker with AIDS.

Someone said to me when it was winter it[’]s time for you to “chill out.” I was like 👁👄👁

Someone forgot to do half the questions in the history test.

And that's what made him go down in history.

Go up to someone and say, "I'm sorry for your loss," and see what they do.

Someone in the Twin Towers ordered two pizzas, plane?

Why did the orphan become a prostitute?

So they could finally call someone "daddy."

Why do orphans go to church?

To call someone "father."

What do you call someone that no one loves?

An orphan.

Wanna know why the plane actually crashed?

Someone turned off flight mode.

(Or a kid just turned on airplane mode.)

Q: How do you know when someone is an opposition leader to Putin?

A: When they are falling from their balcony.

How to know something won’t be fun:

Someone will say, "C'mon, it’ll be fun!"

I was at a funeral and made a joke. No one laughed, but someone died.

I stood on the edge of a building and someone yelled, "Do a flip!"..... and I did.