Size jokes
A nickname to call your short GF:
Little ankle biter Master Yoda Hasbula My little Ewok
Yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it says, "To be continued."
Yo mama so fat, when she took a picture of herself, her phone ran out of storage.
I know 5 fat people; you're 4 of them.
Your mum so fat that when she sat down she said, "Why are there so many people under me?"
Yo mama so fat that when she gets in the truck, it breaks.
Yo mama so fat that you need a jack stand to get her up.
Yo mama is so fat we need to use yo papa!
Your mom is so fat that she cannot look at her feet when taking a shower.
Yo mama so fat that she needs 12 queen size mattresses to go to sleep.
Yo mama so fat that when she was in Uranus, she picked her butthole.
The pinnacle of loyalty is that an ant married an elephant, and after he died, she spent her entire life burying him :)
Why are Mexican families so big?
They don’t know how to put a condom on.
Yo mama's so fat, when she went to the beach in a blue dress, everyone screamed "tsunami!"
The Earth was flat until yo mama buried herself.
Yo mama so thick, they need an aircraft carrier to take her places.
Yo mama so fat, she was the asteroid that killed the dinos.
Yo mama so fat when she goes to the shoe store, she needs to take their advice and get XXXXL.
Yo mama so fat, she needs 17 iPhones to take a selfie.
Yo mama so fat that she would die before reaching the gates of heaven.