Six jokes

What comes next in the pattern, ottffs?

S, because it represents numbers going up: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.

A local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing bet of one thousand dollars that their bartender could squeeze a lemon dry until all the juice ran into a glass, and anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the money. Many people had tried but failed. Over time, weight lifters, lumberjacks, men in the Army, and etc. But still, nobody could do it.

One day, a scrawny little man came in wearing thick glasses and a cheap suit and said in a tiny squeaky voice, "I'd like to try the bet." After the laughter had died down, the bartender said, "okay," and he grabbed a lemon and squeezed away. Then he handed the wrinkled remains of the rhine to the little man. But the crowd's laughter turned to total silence as the man clenched his fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass. As the crowd cheered, the bartender paid the one thousand dollars and asked the little man, "What do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weight lifter, or what?" The man simply replied, "I work for the IRS."

If it is called a forehead, what happened to the five-head, six-head, and seven-head?

What is black and blue and really hates sex?

The six-year-old in my basement.

How do you turn the Roman numeral IX (9) to a six?

Add the "S."

Your hairline goes so far back, your forehead got a six pack.

One night when I was six, I had this super annoying accent, and when I said the number "six," Oh no... One night my Catholic priest asked me how many cookies I needed for my family. I told him six, but thanks to my accent being mixed with many others including Scottish, French, and Russian, it sounded like I said "I need to have sex." He looked at me strange then pulled me into a closet, being a pedo.

When Momma asked me why I was missing for 6 hours, I told her, "I went to get the cookies like you told me to, and father raped the Christianity out of me." The angry look she gave my father was amazing. Then with my Papa, she beat the hell outta him.

Serves him right.

What's tree + tree?

Sticks! (Three + three = six)

What do call six gay men going in a war?

Rainbow Six Siege.

Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate nine.

What do you call six gay men in a war? Rainbow Six Siege.

Six shila.

There was a fish looking for a great meal. He looks above him and sees a fly. He thought, "If that fly drops six inches, I would have a meal." Long story short, a pussy gets wet.

They say if Viagra lasts more than four hours, call the doctor? I’m just wondering, it’s been six hours and I’m still hard, should I call the doctor or hop on another woman?

My friend asked me why I haven’t had milk in six years.

I told him my dad never came back with it.

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 was a registered *sex* offender.

Why was six afraid of seven?

Six, seven.

Six one.

I pulled my kid out of school after a woke teacher taught my six-year-old about pronouns! Yesterday, it was "he/she," today, "they/it," tomorrow, "I/you/we!"

Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't. 61.