Side jokes
Why did the Indian cross the road?
Because he opened a corner shop on the other side.
The ones you hate most are also the ones who are by your side most.
A man once ate the left side of a person. One guy watching asked if the guy he was eating was okay. The man eating him said, "No... it's okay, he's all right now."
Why did the chicken commit suicide?
To get to the other side.
Why did the orphan cross the street? Because they thought that mommy and daddy was on the other side.
Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To get to the other side (suicide).
Why did the second hedgehog cross the road?
To see his flatmate.
What's the difference between a battery and my wife? The battery has a positive side.
You know how we all have different sides? Well, I have a suicidal side. (Here a bang in the next room.) Oh well, not anymore :)
One day a cow ate a fish.
What came out the other side?
A dead fish.
Two guys were walking down the street, and one of the guys told his friend he could talk any blond in the world into giving him a blowjob, any blond!
So the guy bet him 20 bucks and pointed to this cute blond sitting on the side of the road and said, "Alright, let's see it!"
The other guy walks up to the cutie and says, "Hi, my name's Dave, and my doctor just told me that if I didn't get a blowjob from a blond within three hours, the disease I have will kill me in, oh, let's see now, 22 minutes!"
She looked up at him with tears in her eyes and said, "You mean I could save you from dying right now?" Then she says, "Pull it out!"
Ten minutes later, the two men were laughing and patting old Dave on the back when his friend noticed the blond sitting in the alley bawling her eyes out!
So he walks over to her and says, "I would have thought you would be so happy for saving my friend's life?!"
So she looks up at him just crying her eyes out even worse and says, "I could have saved my dad!"
Uranus spins on its side.
What side of the sidewalk do crazy people walk on? The psych-o-path.
Have you heard of the man who got all his left side chopped off?
He was all right.
What do you call a cow that has two legs shorter on one side of its body compared to the other?
LEAN BEEF!
Why did Adele cross the road?
To say hello on the other side.
Eggs are so egg-cellent that they are sunny-side up.
On which side does the chicken have the most feathers?
On the outer side. 😂😂
What is killing your friend called?
A homie-side.
Why was the Burnside Bridge so hot?
Because it's on the burning side.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
The chicken was in 666 pieces after being molested by Gerard brutally with a rail gun covered in spears covered in his lymph. His beak was ripped open and shoved in his feet after glass shards were shoved into his eyes until they came out the other side. His feet were nailed to the ground.