Shut up jokes
2nd comments from Gwen in her bra.
Keie: Man Man man! I LOVE U!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
heyo: 馃憛馃崙
Bari: STOP U FUCKIN PEDOS!!!!!!!!!!
Kenya Bailey: THAT IS ENOUGH! I AM REPORTING ALL OF THIS CRAP TO THE ADMIN!!!!!!!!!!!
Remera Karwi: Shut up! We jus tellin her she looks like a star no need for all that "crap".
Kenya Bailey: One guy put tongue and peach aka butt I know a little bit about oral sex my friend or not!
Guy 1: Why is my cat so angry?
Guy 2: Because she wants to eat your big sausage.
Guy 1: Don't you?
Guy 2: Yeah, it seems delicious.
Guy 1: Mmm, so... w-wait what are you doing? I didn't think you meant the one in my lunch :< Where are you leaving #_#
**Meow...**
Guy 1: Shut up, I will never feed you this sausage. It's not for you :< -_- </3
One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV.
His daughter comes in and says, "Dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head." "Cool," Rose said.
The second daughter walked in and said, "Dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Awesome," Daisy said.
The third daughter came in and said, "DuUuUDeEeEeDrrrrrrrrr!!!" "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!!!"
When there's a news story of people who have died en masse, for example from explosions and fires.
Other people are all "oh no that's terrible!"
Pfft shut up, lying asshole. Trying to be "nice".
I'm like "YAY EXCITING. I don't like being bored hearing 'good news' all of the time."
Girl: Hey. Boy: Hi? Girl: I need to tell you something... Boy: WHAT? Girl: I like you. Boy: And I hate you. Boy: YOU'RE A CHICKEN 馃悢馃悢 馃悢 Girl: I HATE YOU YOU POOP 馃挬馃挬馃挬馃挬 Girl: LOSER L Boy: I thought you said you liked me. Girl: SHUT UP CHICKEN/POOP 馃挬馃挬馃悢 馃悢 Boy: GIRL BYE Girl: Bye Felicia.
Bully: Shut up.
Me: I don't shut up, I grow up, and when I look at you, I throw up.
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common?
No one shuts up about them.
The only thing running in THIS family鈥檚 your big ass mouth! Oh, I鈥檇 better shut up, or Big Bertha鈥檚 gonna confuse my head for a burger!
Teacher: Here, have candy.
Kid: No, I鈥檓 too fat.
Teacher: Shut up, or I鈥檓 gonna fail you.
*Next week*
Teacher: Okay kids, get off the floor and go back to your seats.
Kid: I鈥檓 too fat to get up.
Teacher: Don鈥檛 you remember what I said?
Kid: Yep, elephants don鈥檛 forget.
Bully: You're a loser and fat.
Me: Shut up. The camera thought you were a house.
Kid: Hey, Mum, why are we pushing the car off the cliff?
Mum: Shut up, son, you鈥檒l wake your father!
"Mommy, mommy! Are we janitors?"
"Shut up and pass me the mop."
Chapter 1. "Kid teacher"
Mrs. Lewis: Class, I want everyone to look at their textbooks and find a reasonable essay topic. My suggestion is page 232 or 678. Now, this essay counts as the final grade for the semester. Now do it, or you will repeat 5th grade again! Now turn to page 100, and we'll start reading from there. Do you all understand?
Neilela: Yes ma'am, quick question, we don't have to do it today... do we?
Mrs. Lewis: Yes! It is today!
Andrua: It sounds boring, and all I have to do today is be a big jerk who gives way too much instruction.
Mrs. Lewis: Anyway, let's get to work.
56 hours later.
Mrs. Lewis: Kids, when I call you, please tell me what you liked about your essay. When I call your name, Carl.
Carl: Why me? Yes?
Mrs. Lewis: What did you like about the story, Carl?
Carl: Um... I liked it when... um... um... um... um...
Jeklen: He didn't even read the story because he's too busy trying to look up the letter "J" and its meaning!
Carl: Jeklen, shut up and stop biting your hair.
Jeklen: At least I know what the letter "J" is.
Mrs. Lewis: Class, please listen. Carl, did you read the story that I asked you?
Carl: Well, not really because you were the one reading it in class, so...
Vronica: For real!
Carl: Mhmmm
Mrs. Lewis: Listen class, this homework needs to be done today! DO IT!
Kimbriel: Ms. Lewis, I have a lot of questions about tonight's homework.
Mrs. Lewis: Yes?
Kimbriel: You assigned so many things just for a little test! What?
Mrs. Lewis: I need a break! Peyton, you're in charge!
All students: NO, NOT PEYTON !!!!!!
Peyton: Me? In charge? Of the class?
Jessica: Wow, but you're all about the boredom!
Peyton: Shut up! yeeeeeeee
Peyton: Ms. Lewis, there must be a mistake, how can I be in charge? I'm 11... I think...
Ari: To think that yesterday she thought she was 8 years old.
Oh sorry... I think.
Mrs. Lewis: Have you ever heard of a teacher's vacation?
All students: That's not a thing!
I never heard of it...
Mrs. Lewis: Well, me and Ms. Sumrall, we are going on a "teacher vacation", we can do it because we become calmer, or we don't get angry at the students. AND WE CAN DO IT!
Khloe: Why?
Mrs. Lewis: Because I am an adult.
Ms. Sumrall: Is Petrina ready?
Ms. Lewis: Yes, thank goodness for this!
Kenya: Bye? "Chapter 2" To be continued...
Me: I have a dream.
Mom: What?
Me: For you to fucking shut up.
Omg, shut up guys!
On a bus, a priest sat next to a drunk who was struggling to read a newspaper.
Suddenly, with a slurred voice, the drunk asked the priest:
"Do you know what arthritis is?"
The parish priest soon thought of taking the opportunity to lecture the drunk and replied:
"It's a disease caused by sinful and unruly life: excess, consumption of alcohol, drugs, marijuana, crack, and certainly lost women, prostitutes, promiscuity, sex, binges, and other things I dare not say."
The drunk widened his eyes, shut up, and continued reading the newspaper.
A little later the priest, thinking that he had been too hard on the drunk, tried to soften:
"How long have you had arthritis?"
"I don't have arthritis! It says here in the paper that the Pope has it."
How's your day going?
Shut up, I didn't ask.
Use code tiko#teamfish
Brendon, just shut up, no one was talking to you on the fucking joke! And my sis is not a female dog. If she was, then how the hell would she spell!
There was a guy called Manners, one called Poo, and one called Shut Up.
One day, Manners was on his way to pick up Poo from school. A police officer stopped Shut Up and said:
Police: "What鈥檚 you name?"
Shut Up: "Shut Up."
Police: "Where's your manners?!"
Shut Up: "Picking up Poo."
A lady walked into a bar and ordered their special drink. The bartender then gave her a brown glass full of milk. The lady complained about this, but then the bartender said, "Just shut up and swallow!"