Shoulder Jokes

whats sephen hawkings favrout food hi left shoulder

whats stephen hawkings favrout robot him as his shoulder / wellchair

I know a little girl who once had an accident. When i asked her what her favorite song was she responded with "🎶head shoulders wheels and frame! Wheels and frame!🎶"

how do orphan jokes start?

checking your shoulder

What’s Steven halking favorite song head shoulders knees and toes

There are two doors leading to Heaven: one for henpecked husbands and one for unhenpecked husbands. The line to the door leading to Heaven for henpecked husbands was five abreast and five miles long. The line leading to the door to Heaven for unhenpecked husbands consisted of only one lonely man. The guys from the henpecked husband line looked at the one man in the unhenpecked husband line and shout, “Hey, Charlie, why are you standing over there for?” Charlie glances over his shoulder and observes a sea of humanity of henpecked husbands as far as the eye can see and says grudgingly, “I don’t know. My wife told me to stand here.”

How did they figure out what kind of shampoo Paul walker used? They found his “head and shoulders” in the the dash.

whats steven hawkins favourite meal?

his shoulder

What has 4 wheels 2 legs and loves his shoulder

Stephen hawking

A man was mowing his lawn when blue and reg stuff came out instead of grass. Next thing he knew a smurf was on his shoulder asking if he’s seen his friend.

A womens knitters group is having a meeting and they are all pregnant. They all talk about their pregnancies. One woman says "I'm taking vitamin C so my baby has a healthy immune system". Another knitter says "I'm taking Folic acid to help my baby's brain". Finally one woman says "I'm taking Thalidomide". All the women turn to her and say "Thalidomide ! Don't you know your baby could be born without arms?" The woman shrugs her shoulders and says "I don't know how to knit arms". (Told to me by a woman knitter)

A feminist walks into a bar. Her friend says "oh my god your shoulders are broad!" another woman says "are you sure it's a woman?"

This song is just like how my life is and how my girlfriend left. - Do Re Mi- By- blackbear Do, re, mi, fa, so (Yeah, yeah, yeah, oh) Do, re, mi, fa, so (Yeah, yeah, yeah) Yeah, if I could go back to the day we met I probably would just stay in bed You run your mouth all over town And this one goes out to the sound Of breakin' glass on my Range Rover Pay me back, or bitch it's over All the presents I would send Fuck my friends behind my shoulder Next time, I'ma stay asleep I pray the Lord my soul to keep, oh And you got me thinkin' lately Bitch, you crazy And nothing's ever good enough I wrote a little song for ya It go like Do, re, mi, fa, so fuckin' done with you, girl So fuckin' done with all the games you play I ain't no Tic-Tac-Toe Send the X and O's on another note I'm do, re, mi, fa, so fuckin' done with you, baby So send the X and O's on another note, I'm ghost (Yeah, yeah, yeah, oh) If I could go back to the day we met I probably would've stayed in bed You wake up everyday and make me feel like I'm incompetent Designer shoes and Xanax tabs Compliments your make-up bag You never had to buy yourself a drink 'Cause everybody want to tap that ass sometime And you got me thinkin' lately Bitch, you crazy And nothing's ever good enough I wrote a little song for ya It go like Do, re, mi, fa, so fuckin' done with you, girl So fuckin' done with all the games you play I ain't no Tic-Tac-Toe Send the X and O's on another note I'm do, re, mi, fa, so fuckin' done with you, baby So send the X and O's on another note, I'm ghost (Yeah, yeah, yeah, oh) I wrote a little song for you, it go like Do, re, mi, fa, so fuckin' done with you, girl So fuckin' done with all the games you play I ain't no Tic-Tac-Toe Send the X and O's on another note I'm do, re, mi, fa, so fuckin' done with you, baby So send the X and O's on another note, I'm ghost (Yeah, yeah, yeah) Do, re, mi, fa, so (Yeah, yeah, yeah) So send the X and O's on another note, I'm ghost

A Blond and her Brunette friend where chatting about their boyfriends; the brunette goes on and on about how dirty her boyfriend is with her. To not be outdone the blond retort's. Thats nothing once we we're in the kitchen I can't believe I didn't see it coming one minute I turned and He just got it all on my face it was so thick and hard! it covered my mouth, my nose,my shoulders, and eyes it even got in my hair; and when i looked up at him all he could say was whoops the Flower went everywhere!

I was walking home when i saw a children crossing the streets on his own. I went towards him and tap his shoulder and said "hey Little kid, you are not suppose to be walking on your own."the kid turns out to be a dwarf.

As I’m lying down on the table for a radiation treatment, a small angel lands on one shoulder, a tiny devil on the other shoulder. And then the mind game begins:

Angel: This won’t last long. You are perfectly lined up. The treatment only lasts a few mins. Remember, stay absolutely still.

Devil: Did she just twitch?

A: No. She didn’t twitch.

D: I think I saw her finger twitch.

A: Well, even if it did, it’s her thigh the techs are aiming at.

D: She wants to scratch her face.

A: Stop it! She can handle staying still a few minutes.

D: But her cheek has an itchy spot.

A: She can just let it itch. She doesn’t need to scratch every itch. She will just have to think about something else.

D: Wow...that cheek is really itchy...

A: Think about: Flowers. Acrylic painting. Did the trash get picked up this morning? Her grandson Oliver’s smile...

D: How about a song?

A: Good idea!

D: How about... “Never going to give you up. Never going to let you down....”🎶

A: OMG! You just Rick-rolled her! She’s in the middle of a treatment! You know that’s the only part she knows!

D: That’s okay. She’ll just repeat the words she knows over and over and over and....

A: Don’t be so mean!

D: “Never going to give you up...🎶”

A: Stop it!

D: Her toe! Her big toe! Did you see that? She just twitched it!

A: No, she didn’t.

D: I bet it screwed up the test and they have to start over....

A: She didn’t screw anything up!

D: She totally screwed the test up and they were more than halfway done. If they start over at the beginning, she will get too much radiation, and they will end up slicing her whole leg off!

A: That’s not how it works...

D: Or they just stop all together and she only gets a partial treatment and her tumor won’t get enough radiation.

A: They know what they are doing!

D: ...And it won’t shrink the tumor and the whole thing fails. And the doctor will have to amputate her leg.

A: No! No! No! That’s not how any of this...

D: ...And when they amputate, it will be at the hip and not below the knee because the tumor is in her thigh.

A: Stop this right now!!

D: “Never going to give you up....🎶”

A: Stop!

D: “...never going let you down....🎶”

A: I’m not going to let you...

D: “Never going to give you up...🎶” .