Short jokes
Don't do suicide shit. Nearly killed me, tbh. 🙏🙏🙏🙏
What did the man say to the deaf kid? He said...
What's an emo's favorite time of year?
Fall.
Don't give emos crack, they're high enough.
I took my friend skydiving once, and he jumped out of the plane without a parachute. Then I remembered he was emo.
Normally the reason you don't get a knife when you ask for one is because the person you asked is emo.
What's an emo's favorite part about being dunked?
The hangover.
How do you win an argument against an emo kid?
Give him a gun, he'll just shoot himself.
what's another name for cumming inside of a woman?
loading the dishwasher.
What do you call an Asian who gets a B?
It's not a B-sian.
Dead.
What do you call a surprised Asian?
Ho Lee Fuc.
I think it’s dumb that people say a woman belongs in the kitchen.
How else is the rest of the house going to get cleaned?
I would never slap a woman, then I’d be destroying property.
What did the cops say when someone called him racist?
"How can I be racist? My wife's eye is black."
I believe Alia is a true god because they say in the beginning there was an explosion.
what do you call an American looking at cloud shapes?
Oppenheimer
What's an old Japanese man's last words?
"Hey, that cloud looks like a mushroom, or is it just me?"
My son told me he has to bring an object for show and tell at school.
So I had him bring my wife.
I think God is cool with abortion.
After all, he did kill his only son.
My grandma asked me if I could visit her.
I told her no, I don’t like graveyards.