Short jokes

Steven Hawking died. I said, "Why? Did his wheelchair break?"

What's worse than a baby in a trash can?

A baby in 10 trash cans.

Where do Dairy Queen and Burger King go after dinner?

White Castle.

I would tell you a joke about pizza,

but it's too cheesy.

I'm taking a guitar lesson at school. My band instructor told me he was going to hit me with my guitar. I asked him if that was a "fret."

I'm taking a guitar lesson at school. My band instructor told me he was going to hit me with my guitar. I asked him if that was a fret.

It's weird how Stephen Hawking's last name sounds like "walking and talking," but he could not do either of those!

If Stephen Hawking got into a fight, he could not stand up for himself.

It sucks that Stephen Hawking died so soon, the new Intel update just came out.

Riddle: I don't move, I travel across the world, but I never leave the corner. What am I?

Answer: A stamp.

I saw Stephen Hawking using an ATM. It is nice to see he had found someone before he shut down.

Now touring: Stephen Hawking unplugged.

Why did Stephen Hawking roll across the road?

Because he had amyotrophic lateral sclerosis.

I was both shocked and amazed to hear Stephen Hawking kicked the bucket.

Well, I don't have a joke but... I have a poem.

My dick is red, your pussy is blue. I... lied to you.

Kevin McClean

I heard he's doing a revival tour next month. It's called "Stephen Hawking Unplugged."

Stephen Hawking died crossing the road. He was hit by a Universal Serial Bus.

In a cruel twist of irony, Stephen Hawking's favorite song was "I've Got the Power."

Who is Stephen Hawking's wife?

The American Siri.