Shes jokes

I was sitting at a bench at the park and saw a lady. She asked which kid was mine, and I responded, "I haven't decided yet."

Teacher: "I'll call your mother."

Orphan: "Go on, see if she picks up."

A: Why are you so sad?

B: I was watching porn, and all of a sudden my wife opened the door.

A: Ok, I see, but is that really such a big deal?

B: I mean, she opened the door in the movie.

My girlfriend left me for spending my own money. I buy this bitch thousands upon thousands of dollars worth of stuff, but I spend 100 dollars on a prostitute, she leaves me.

Today, I had an exam in school. When I was done, I raised my hand and yelled, “Pisstiano Penaldo!”

My teacher smiled and took my paper. She knew I was finished.

I told my mom to get rope for a project, and when she got home, I got the good old coat hanger out and hung myself up.

"I met a girl and she's 28."

"Now I'm the coolest guy in all of 8th grade."

- AJR

Did you know Helen Keller had a sister?

Neither did she.

Yo Mama so stupid that when she saw a sign that said, “Airport Left,” she turned around and went home.

Yo mama's so stupid, she took a Covid test and got an F.

Yo mama's so stupid, when I told her that she lost her mind, she went looking for it.

Your momma's so fat she started "Fat Lives Matter". Meetings are everyday:

11 o'clock McDonald's, 12 o'clock KFC, 1 o'clock Pizza Hut.

Yo mama so fat, she uses the equator as her belt.

What’s the best part about fucking an emo chick?... she's limited edition.

I went to my sister's room one day. I saw a trophy, so I asked my sister how she won it. My sister said the neighbors gave it to her because she gave out the best hand jobs in the neighborhood. I guess my sister put her hands to good use.

A fat girl was dancing on the table, and I said, "Nice legs." She says, "You really think so?" And I say, "Yes, definitely, most tables would have been broken by now."

My sister gives her hamster to my brother since she thinks I'm irresponsible, so I throw it out the window.

A woman just went through labor. She asked the doctor, "Was it a healthy delivery?" The doctor replies, "It wasn't delivery, it's DiGiorno."

I started a new job. My boss said, "Hi, my name is Rebecca, but people call me Becky." I said, "My name is Kyle, but people call me Dick."

She said, "How do you get Dick from Kyle?" I replied, "You just ask nicely."

Your momma is so old she has been a waitress at the last supper.