Science jokes
What do you call Stephen Hawking's toes on fire?
Hot Wheels.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
It's me. I can't get in because Stephen Hawking is blocking the door!
What’s Stephan Hawking's favorite dance move?
The robot.
What has 4 wheels, 2 legs, and loves his shoulder?
Stephen Hawking.
Steven Hawking walks into a bar... Yeah.
(Not Original Joke)
Stephen Hawking is the fastest footballer ever--he could just charge up the Left Wing!
Why did Stephen Hawking go on to Britain's Got Talent?
To sing.
Mitosis!!!!!! >:)
His face.
Why did the royal wedding get more publicity than a school shooting?
Cause a royal wedding doesn't happen once a week.
Why did the people think Stephen Hawking was disrespectful?
'Cause he didn't stand up for the national anthem.
Friend 1: How can the skeleton tell it was going to rain?
Me: He could feel it in his bones.
Friend 1: No, he read the forecast, you fucking idiot!
Heheh ;3
Have you ever walked in to Stephen Hawking's house?
No, neither has he.
The reason Steven Hawking died is he lost his internet connection.
There is a really, really small guy and his name is Adam, so I say, "Hey, look, it's an atom!"
Why is a moon rock tastier than an Earth rock? It’s a little meteor.
Why did Steven Hawking go to hell?
Because there is a stairway to heaven.
A man was at the temperature -273.15°C. He was OK.
For some reason, quarks sound really strange to me.
Q. What did one Iron atom say to the other Iron atom?
A. "We're in the Matrix."