Science jokes
Earlier that day...
Mars: Okay Venus, you need to stop with the puns.
Mission on space.
Mars: Moon? You okay?
Moon:...
Mars: Moon come on! Stop spacing out!
*Venus and Moon giving her the smirk*
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one-liners?
Because he can’t do stand up.
What do you call an old snowman that survived till summer?...
Water... yup, water...
Scientists say I'm made up of 75% of water.
But after jumping in the ocean, it's 100%, just like my depression.
All real chemists know that alcohol is always a solution.
I did this chemistry joke yesterday, but I didn't get a reaction.
Love is in the air...
Wrong! Nitrogen, Oxygen, and Carbon Dioxide are in the air!
A nucleus walked into a bar. He asked the bartender, “How much for a drink?” The bartender replied, “For you, NO CHARGE!”
Very funny battery joke.
What do you call Stephen Hawking's toes on fire?
Hot Wheels.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
It's me. I can't get in because Stephen Hawking is blocking the door!
What’s Stephan Hawking's favorite dance move?
The robot.
What has 4 wheels, 2 legs, and loves his shoulder?
Stephen Hawking.
Steven Hawking walks into a bar... Yeah.
(Not Original Joke)
Stephen Hawking is the fastest footballer ever--he could just charge up the Left Wing!
Why did Stephen Hawking go on to Britain's Got Talent?
To sing.
Mitosis!!!!!! >:)
His face.
Why did the royal wedding get more publicity than a school shooting?
Cause a royal wedding doesn't happen once a week.
Why did the people think Stephen Hawking was disrespectful?
'Cause he didn't stand up for the national anthem.
Friend 1: How can the skeleton tell it was going to rain?
Me: He could feel it in his bones.
Friend 1: No, he read the forecast, you fucking idiot!
Heheh ;3