Roll jokes
What did one piece of toilet paper say to the other? "I feel really wiped."
I was in my car listening to my radio. Steve Winwood's song came on, "Just Roll With It, Baby." I said that must be one of Stephen Hawking's favorite songs; he sings it to his girlfriend.
When an asteroid is coming to kill us all:
98.9% of the population: OMG, we're all gonna die!
1% of the population: Eh... I never had any friends anyway.
Alia: ROLL THE INTRO!
Q: What is red, white, and blue and fun to watch?
A: A cop car rolling over after trying to catch someone for speeding.
Roll your eyes back, you might find a brain back there.
Fatty and Skinny were in a bed.
Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was dead.
He died because he rolled too far away from the wall outlet and got unplugged.
What do you call a bunch of Aboriginals rolling down a hill?
Abo-lanche.
A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat. He is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with, "What do you mean? I already did it." Then the police ran back to the school to apprehend the other people he was planning it with. The cops busted in through the doors, which caused a smoke trap to go off, which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear, the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles, 4 per pole. Back at the station, holding the kid being apprehended, the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said, "Aww, it pays to be lazy!"
Why did the toilet roll roll down the hill? To get to the bottom!
How did Harry Potter get down the hill?
Running, JK rolling!
What's Stephen Hawking's other favorite song?
Steve Winwood's "Just Roll with It Baby."
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite genre of music? Rock and roll.
Why did the snail paint a big "S" on his car?
Because he wanted people to say look at that S-car go when he rolled by.
What’s Stephen Hawking’s favorite band? The Rolling Stones.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite song?
- They see me rolling.
Why didn't Stephen Hawking cross the road?
Because he rolled over to the other side!
Yo momma so fat, her four kids use her as a bed and her fat rolls as cozy blankets.
Stephen Hawking walks into... er...rolls into a bar.
He had a song named after him: "They see me rolling."