Realisation Jokes

I constantly wonder how people can live happily ever after but then i realised that antidepressants don't make you OD.

I was submitting this joke and i realised. Stephen hawking couldnt.

It had the recaptcha im not a robot

I was doing a magic show, i tried to make a bunny disappear but it didn’t work. I walked outside in shame, i looked up and realised the towers had disappeared!!!!

I asked my now ex boyfriend why he’s scared of my cat. He said it was because of the scratches on my arm.

I told him that my cat doesn’t scratch, but he didn’t believe me. He realised what I meant when he noticed I kept hiding my wrist from everyone else.

(Kinda based on the fact that my ex is indeed scared of cats, and he has been scared of my cat so yeah 😂)

this one time i said that john cena looks like crap but i realised i cant see him LOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

I Didn’t realise I had to putty jokes into categories my bad ..

Unleash the jokers .... 👍

I braced my self when i got in the car but then i realised my wife wasnt driving

Yesterday a woman stabbed me so I stabbed her back then I realised she was the vaccine woman.

A girl had black hair also i threw rubbish at to realise she wasnt a bin

I went to China and said I have a big cock so they thought I said they look like a cock then I realised I said it in English

A guy is at his locker and a girl comes and says hey i love you and the he says ok cool she then replies and says well what do you think about are love he says count the stars and then she says oh infinity and he replies with nope its just a waste of time

For a while lead was used in pencils but ... we realised that it might not have been the smartest idea because it lead (badoom ching) to some people getting lead poisoning.

A boy asked his dad for a some money to buy an ice-cream with. So he went to an icecream van. Whilst he was in the queue 2 boys asked him what flavour he was getting he told them strawberry. The two boys were shocked and beat him up. The icecream man felt bad and gave him his strawberry ice-cream for free. When he got home his dad also asked what flavour he bought the boy said strawberry. His dad then kicked him out of the house. The boy confused walked down the street and was stopped buy the police who were looking for a boy who had been eating strawberry ice-cream. The boy said thats me and the policeman arrested him. A week later in court the boy was on trial. The judge asked, ''can you tell me what were you doing on the fith of may''(the day he was arrested) the boy said I was eatimg ice-cream. Yhe judge decided he was innocent. On the way out the judge asked him what the flavour was (he had forgotten to ask during the trial). Of course he answered with strawberry the judge horrified realised he had given the wrong verdict and the boy should have been executed. Unfortunately he couldn't change what had happened so the boy walked out and crossed the road but was hit by a car and died. The moral of the story is look left and right before crossing the road

I was listening to some Drake in class. My teacher shouted to turn it off. She then exclaimed that “Drake is mid and his music is very Pessi” I didn’t understand the meaning until I checked the dictionary and realised it is a synonym for overrated

A man was having a dream. He dreamt about a mystical creature that was commonly known as the god of toast. When the man woke up, he turned to tell his wife about the dream. When he delivers the toast god punch line, his wife shrugged as she faced the opposite direction to the man. The man turned around also and started sobbing as he realised his marriage is in shambles

Your walking on the street when you realised that your in the road as you feel the horn dying away.