FIRST DATE
man: i work with animals every day woman: oh how sweet! what is it that you do? man: im a butcher..
An attractive man and a blonde meet in an elevator. "Where are you heading today?" the man asks. "I'm going down to give blood." "How much do you get paid for giving blood?" "About $30." "Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100." The woman slightly annoyed gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again. "Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?" "Sperm bank," she mumbles with her mouth full.
A profession golfer driving his Porsche picked up an Irish girl hitchhiker. He had his golfing gear on the back seat. The Irish girl picked up something and asked, "What are these?" "Those are tees," he said. "I rest my balls on them when I drive." "Wow!" said the girl. "What will those car makers think of next!"
So I'm the Cable Guy around the neighborhood and I do everybody's table so I walked into this one house and I noticed a little kid and the mom was upstairs I was asking where her mom was and she wasn't answering and it looked like something was wrong so I asked if anything was wrong she didn't answer so I kind of raise my voice at her but she still didn't answer and then I realized the hearing aid in her ear
Itβs all fun and games at βtake your kid to work dayβ until you realize your dad is a suicide bomber.
Being a man that is poor really isn't that bad as long as you are involved in the world's oldest profession and you are well-endowed and you are not homophobic and as long as you can suck the chrome off a tailpipe then you have nothing to worry about if you are desperate enough to pay your bills π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ lack of money is the root of all evil π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π΅ π π π π π ππ π π π π π π ππ π
what do you call an Asian receptionist?
Tai ping
So if being a paedophile is a career, then burying the bodies must be gardening.
What do you call a prostitute with no arm or legs
Cash and carry
So i was sitting with my little brother and talk about our dreams. "What do you wanna be when you grow up?" I asked him. He answered "A doctor!". I wanted to tease him so i said "I wouldn't be treated by a doctor like you". I was hoping he would get mad or something but instead, he calmly replied "Brother, i said doctor. Not a vet"
What do magicians and prostitutes have in common? Answer: disappearing acts
Only profession one could have coronavirus and still goes to work is suicide terrorist.
What's the difference between a Doberman Pinscher and a Social Worker? Eventually, you can get a baby back from a Doberman Pinscher.
My doctor is a very attractive woman; gorgeous face, nice boobs, smoking hot body. She said to me, βYou are in your 50βs now, you have GOT to stop masturbating.β I asked why. She replied, βBecause Iβm trying to examine you, yaβ pervert!!!β
They said I was depressed, I should make an effort to do what I love. I had to pay a hooker for, twelve hours work. ... I felt nothing, but its was nice, being with someone who felt the same.