I want coffee like my men.
Dark.
Preference Jokes
I don't like the term "kidnapping." I prefer "surprise adoption."
Why did Jeffery Dahmer not eat old people?
He does not like roasted vegetables.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be single than be with someone like you.
How are gay people like mice?
They both hate pussies.
Why don't vegetarians moan during sex?
Because they don't want to admit that meat makes them happy.
I guess age is just a number, but in your boyfriend's case, a personal preference.
I only trust people that like big butts... they cannot lie.
What's better: nailing Jesus or getting nailed?
Depends on who's sucking.
If it does more than pee, it's too old for me!
The first windmill said to the second, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The second windmill said, "I'm a big metal fan!"
I like my women how I like my cigarettes: Smokin’ hot, and with a little saliva on the butt.
I like my clocks like I like people.
Under 12.
A guy asks his priest friend what he wants to eat, and the priest says "bad boys." Then his friend asks, "What kebab do you want?" and the priest says, "B Bricked up Caucasian or Asian will do."
James Bond: Vodka martini.
Bartender: Shaken, not stirred.
James Bond: Do I look like I give a damn?
When you know you have a gay friend, but you find out that they like you!
What's the difference between a golf ball and a G-spot?
A man will actually look for the golf ball.
Dark humor is like food; some people get it, others don't...
My favorite dark joke is orphan jokes. For no apparent reason.
What's worse, being loved or hated? 'Cause when you're loved you could be left alone or be betrayed, but when you're hated no one's there to leave you. What do you think?
