Teacher: Now class, if you are dumb, please stand up.
Class: no one stands up.
Teacher: Oh c’mon. I know someone over here is dumb. *teacher waves her finger around the left side of the room*
Little Johnny: stands up
Teacher: Oh, Johnny, you think you’re dumb?
Little Johnny: No, I just feel bad you’re standing alone.
How emos propose:would you please join my family tree.
Credit to my friend @omnom
Man: I know how to please a woman. Woman: Then please leave me alone.
Man: I want to give myself to you. Woman: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.
Man: Your hair color is fabulous. Woman: Thank you. It's on aisle three at the corner drug store.
Man: You look like a dream. Woman: Go back to sleep.
Man: I can tell that you want me. Woman: Yes, I want you to leave.
Man: Hey, baby, what's your sign? Woman: Do not enter. -OR- Stop.
Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.
Man: What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? Woman: I hate you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.
My wife asked me to please quit singing Wonderwall in the shower
I said maybe.
After Monday and Tuesday even the calendar says W T F -Subscribe to LowkeyNel💓🌈 on yt please
Butter butter and butter please please bring me butter
Life isn't about pleasing yourself and that you have to do things for the sole benefit of God. It’s like masturbation. Sometimes it’s not getting yourself off, but getting someone else off too. That’s what thighjobs are for.
What did the horses say to the donkeys Jackasses please like
I AM SFLUGO FOUNDER OF THE PRO ORPHAN JOKE CLUB. Just want to say that people spamming does notjing and we will keep making our jokes!! #SaveOrphanJokes and please say in the comments if you want to join the club
IF YOUR A GIRL, PLEASE COMMENT
Hey Kenya can we talk please!
Has anyone walked in on there parents making love? I have.
Please comment! :)
A blonde crashes a airplane Officer: could you please explain to me what happened? Woman: It got so cold in the plane I turned the fan off. Officer: *face palms self* Also officer: Here's you sign
My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
the sad thing is when they ride the scooters in wal mart.....really you declining to walk is what got your fat ass in that scooter to begin with.....and damned if they arent buying diet soda.....please....cull this shit...we dont need them in society...kfc is not a disease
Please dont make a joke about me im just a human
Health and safety tips: looking at your hairline is hazardous, for your best interest please look away.
A king ordered to executed a gay man. The gay man came and he said "please don't behead me have pitty". King replied " I will have pitty because I will implale you lets you enjoy your last moments".
this guy comes knocking on the door in hell and speaks to god please let me out it is too cold in here god is all confused there is a big fire in there the guy answers yes there is but you cannot get near it all the bishops cardinals and priests are sitting around it
