Person Jokes

I hate how funerals are always at 9 a.m. -- I'm not really a mourning person.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

How can a person from Alabama tell that someone is an illegal immigrant?

If they are dating someone that isn't related to them.

why did the depressed person cross the road.

to get ran over.

If a person shoot's a person about to commit suicide, is it making it less painful or is it murder?

Person A: cmon person B, just be happy, smile Person B: over my dead body Person B: *gets the noose*

What does a crippled person's legs and the twin towers have in common, they both went down and never came back up

Me:if the skinny person goes skinny dipping then what do fat people do?

my friend: Chunky dunks

I was having issues in my personal and professional life. I hated everyone. I was on the brink of a mental breakdown and depression. I decided to see a therapist about it. The therapist suggested that I should write letters to the people I hate and then burn them. I must admit I feel much better...

But now I don't know what to do with the letters.

Murder is the same as suicide except the other person is doing it for you

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

What's a depressed person's least favorite type of cereal???

LIFE

Are you a grave, 'cause I want you on me

30 people died in a car wreck before they got to Heaven God asked for one wish because they died in a tragic way the first lady she was obsessed with her looks so she asked to be beautiful and God granted her wish the next person didn't know what to wish for so they wish for the same thing the guy in the very back was laughing having a grand old time then god got to the person before the last he aaid the same he wished to be beautiful when God got to the last person he said I want them all to be ugly again.