Parent jokes

Friend: I have the eye of the tiger.

Me: So what? I have the balls of a gorilla.

Parents: We can't come back to the zoo next week!

Dad: Uh, yeah!

Son: Mom, Dad, what are you doing!

Parents: Sex!

Son: What?

Parents: Look, you can spectate!

Not to be rude or anything, but I'm not adopted. My boyfriend is, and some of these are really mean because sometimes their parents give them up just because they're ugly or just because of their skin color. We should stop making fun of them, and yes, I do giggle sometimes, but they can be really hurtful sometimes.

What do you call an octopus dad?

An octodad.

I'm serious, what's a "dad?"

There are 5 cows in a field. One of them is the mom, the rest are kids. One of the kids walked up to the mom and asked, "Why am I named Daisy?" and then a daisy fell on her head.

The second cow came up to the mom and asked, "Why am I named Rose?" and then a rose fell on her head. Then the 3rd cow said, "Why am I named Violet?" then a violet fell on her head. Then the 4th cow walked up and said, "Merrrbere." Then the mom said, "Shutup, cinder block!"

I have a daughter; she’s a fan. Her name is Penny. Fan she was born on the mountain Pen y Fan. I adopted her because her mum fell off the cliff after birthing Penny. It doesn’t matter, really; Penny’s mum wasn’t a big fan of her anyway.

Phone rings; "Are your parents home?"

Orphan; "Stop calling here!"

My son.

What is the orphan's favorite toy from his parents?

They don’t have parents to pay for a toy.

You're so fat that you're gonna be my next hamburger for dinner and the next In-N-Out, just like your parents.

What did the white baby say to his Chinese parents?

"Two wongs don’t make a white."

When a boy points at his parents, they disappear.

What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?

A family portrait........

You might say I'm mean but what are they gonna do..... tell their parents?

Wait..........

What did the parents say to the orphans?

"YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"

If an orphan got hit, will they go tell their parents?

Teacher: Anyone missing?

Orphan: My parents.

Teacher: Something that is real, kid.

Orphan: My family.

Teacher: OMG, out of my classroom, kid!

Cousin: Hahaha, I am their biological parent.

Kid: So what? At least they love me more.

Hey guys, I have a question.

Doesn't everyone's parents tell them don't take candy from strangers? Then what is Halloween?

Why do orphans have no parents?

Say your joke in the comments.